When Silence Is Broken The Night Is Torn
by ErikaTusspot
Summary: Noodle has the perfect life. She has 2D. But what will happen when suddenly her comfortable world falls apart, when Murdoc does something so unforgivable. What will she fall to? Will anyone try to help her?Or just leave her like they did before.
1. Innocence

Disclaimer: I do not own Gorillaz or any of the Gorillaz characters in any way!!

A/N: Well this is going to be my new story! And I hope to keep up on it so I hope you like. Review??? ^_^

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

_Waking up I see that everything is ok_

_The first time in my life_

_and now it's so great_

_Slowing down I look around and I am so amazed_

_I think about the little things_

_that make life great_

_I wouldn't change a thing about it_

_This is the best feeling_

_**-Avril Lavigne: Innocence **_

She awoke. Her piercing emerald eyes darted around the room looking for him, searching for any trace that he had been in her room last night. But there was none. Not even a hair or the smell of his butterscotch skin lingered in the room. She took in a sigh of relief, or was it disappointment. She longed for him to be hers. If only he knew what he means to her. But Noodle knew she would have to get over it. It never was and never will be he likes her, but not in the kind of way you count. With that last thought Noodle clumsily rolled out of bed and went to go use the toilet Murdoc neglected to clean more than once a year. Well, only when he has to. But as usual when she was fixing herself up for the day she could smell the sweet scent of Russel making breakfast for the band. Everything he makes always smells so good and even tastes better.

"Mmmm," Noodle sighed as she took in what she thought smelled like warm, fluffy pancakes and freshly cooked bacon. Noodle followed her nose down the destructed hallway took a right and walked into the kitchen where all three of her other band mates were already seated and chowing down. There was only the general conversation about practices, shows, booze, and girls. None of which Noodle cared for at the moment. But one particular conversation grasped her attention.

"Hey dullard," Murdoc demanded with his mouth full of mushed up pancake.

" What," 2D half asleep responded. Noodle guessed that 2D was probably up all night with a girl in bed, as usual.

"I wanted to go to the bar tonight," Murdoc rejoined.

"Yes, Muds and why do I need to go with you?"

"Because I need someone to drive Face Ache,"

"Okay fine whatever," 2D agreed and went to steal more pancakes off of Russel's pile. Hearing this Noodle grew red in the face she hates when 2D drinks and he knows that. He always comes home drunk out of his mind, and with less brain cells than he started with. Of course Murdoc said he would just be driving but that's what Murdoc always says, always. And half, well most of the time they bring home girls, and not just to talk to. Noodle learned that when she was very young and stumbled into Murdoc's Winnebago at a very questionably hour. "Never again," she agreed to herself.

"What was that, love," Russel asked her.

"Oh, nothing Russel-san just talking to myself," she exclaimed then added, "Russel-san could you please take me to the shore today?"

Russel pondered the question for a split second and replied, "Sure baby girl that sounds good. Murdoc, 2D do you want to come along?" Noodle cut him off, "Actually Russel-san I was thinking it could be just you and me."

"If that's what you want Noodle girl."

"Yes, Russel it is." Getting odd stares from 2D and Murdoc she arose from the table and skipped back into her room to grab what she needed to go to the shore, so when Russel was ready she would be ready to go. She didn't know if she would be swimming that day, but she decided to pack a swimsuit just in case. She searched all her dresser drawers and only found three swimsuits that she could wear in front of Russel, not that she wasn't comfortable. Its that well Russel is the closest thing that she ever had to a father figure, and he didn't like her to show anything less than about what a nuns dress covers. At least that's what it felt like sometimes, she loves him very much, but he has to understand she is 16 now and she should be able to show a little bit more skin. Just look at what other 16 year old are wearing these days! One swimsuit after another she tried on the three. It looked like the choices were a black one piece that has cutouts on the sides, a pink polka dot bikini with a skirt, or a tacky-too-much-skin-NOT-showing bright orange swimsuit. Well she knew what one Russel would pick, so she chose to wear the pink polka dot bikini. It would be fine it wasn't too skimpy and it covers what it is supposed to, so what's the harm! She pranced over to her bed and placed the swimsuit in her beach bag and walked into her bathroom to grab her hairbrush (With ponytails), sunscreen, sunglasses, and a beach towel, pink to match her swimsuit. She checked her self over in the dirty bathroom mirror to make sure she was presentable enough then left her room to go see where Russel went off to.

It didn't take long to find him. Only about two milliseconds, because when she trusted the door open she ran right into him and fell harshly onto her butt. "Well, there you are Noodle girl I was getting worried about you,"

Noodle laughed, "Hah Russel do you think I would get lost on the way to my own room?"

" No, no maybe not lost, but eaten by a zombie, or a demon yes! But, Noodle you _could_ get lost in your room! Man, when is the last time you cleaned it?" Russel snorted. Noodle now looking around her room did notice it was a bit of a disaster. There were clothes everywhere from her trying to find the swimsuits, her bed was lazily unmade, and her bathroom looked like a hurricane went through it, stayed there for 5 days, and then did it again. In other words a total mess. Noodle didn't even know why. She wasn't usually this messy; she always kept things pretty well picked up and under control. She turned back to Russel and shrugged her shoulders, told him she would clean it later and walked out her door, closing it so no one would see what hurricane Noodle left behind. Russel knew what she was doing laughed, and led her down the hall to the car park, got into the Jeep, and left. Noodle was very excited to go to the shore. It was one of her favorite places to be since she arrived in the Fed-Ex crate about seven years ago. Somehow going there always made her feel calm, and like she had a reason to be alive. She could sit there for days and days and never grow tired of it. Watching the serene waves rise and then crash swiftly onto the soft shore sand. More than sitting right up to the waves, on low-tide she liked to go sit on her "special rock." And it was truly her rock. All the men knew that the rock was her spot, her happy place, and her sanctuary. So as the time before, and the time before that, AND the time before that she took the mile and a half walk to her rock. With Russel following far behind, but that's okay because that gave her some time to think. And she usually can't think that well when she has a 200-pound man breathing down her back. She usually tries to think up new lyrics for songs or about new sound possibilities, but not this time. She thought about what she was thinking about so deeply this morning. 2D. Why does she like him so much? She's always kind of liked him, but more in a brotherly way, or so she thought. Maybe this feeling was opening a new door for her? Whichever it was she would open it, take the opportunity. Just like she did when she hoped into the Fed-Ex crate and shipped herself to Kong. And it was great; to this day she hasn't regretted it. As Russel put it her life had innocence. Her life was great. She had three great people that actually cared for her! She had her health, her virginity, her friends, and her Innocence. That's what makes her special. She is not like most teenage girls who are into drugs, drinking, and short skirts. She was just Noodle, and that's all she could be for now. Now, only a few paces from her rock with Russel still fading in the distance, she let the sound of the waves crashing on the beach, the sand under her feet, and the seagulls peeping above her head take her away. Away from what little problems she actually had. She carefully climbed up to the rock and let the Ocean spray her in the face with its rich, salty water. She breathed in deep and she was gone. Floating through space, diving back to earth into the water swimming never stopping to look back. This was her high. She was standing on a Ferris wheel not falling off when it plunged down, she was flying through the sky joining the peeping birds that still flew above her, she was….

A panting Russel came up behind her and almost made her fall off the rock.

" Baby girl I think its time we be heading back,"

"But, Russel-san its not even dark out yet," Noodle whined.

" I think you better open your eyes Noods," Noodle opened her bright eyes slowly afraid if she did it too fast they would jump right out of her head and walk away. She blinked. It was dark outside. How long has she been sitting here? When she arrived on the rock it was light outside. She got up slowly and steadily and jumped off the rock, which was about covered with water from high-tide coming in, and ran over to hug Russel.

"Russel-san, thank you so much for taking me here today, it really meant a lot and well I just needed to get out of the house!"

"Anytime Noodle girl just let me know." The car ride back to Kong was a blur to Noodle. She could vaguely remember being carried into Kong, and being put on the couch of their living room. She hardly remembered that she was home until she awoke at about three in the morning by some inhabitants walking through the living room where she _was_ sleeping. The moon casted a single beam of light through the window as one by one each person walked past the light. She could tell the first was Murdoc, and then 2D, but there was a third person. A girl. Maybe for Murdoc's pleasure? But as suddenly as her eyes fluttered to be seduced back into sleep she saw the very drunk 2D pull the girl into a heart throbbing kiss. Noodles heart cracked.

_This innocence is brilliant_

_I hope that it will stay_

_This moment is perfect_

_Please don't go away_

_I need you now_

_And I'll hold on to it_

_Don't you let it pass you by_

_**-**_**Avril Lavigne: Innocence**


	2. Change

A/N: Ok guys so here is the second chapter to When Silence Is Broken The Night Is Torn! I hope you all liked the first chapter and I would love it if you gave me a review!! KK so once again I DO NOT own Gorillaz ECT… Thankies for reading! 3Erika

_And it's a sad picture, the final blow hits you_

_Somebody else gets what you wanted again and_

_You know it's all the same, another time and place_

_Repeating history and you're getting sick of it_

_But I believe in whatever you do_

_And I'll do anything to see it through_

_Because these things will change_

_Do you feel it now?_

_These walls that they put up to hold us back will fall down_

_This revolution, the time will come_

_For us to finally win_

_We sing hallelujah, we sing hallelujah_

**Taylor Swift: Change**

The loud cawing of the black birds right outside her window didn't even cause her to stir in her sleep that morning. Not the sound of Russel pounding on her door to let her know breakfast was ready, or the loud stomping of Murdoc walking down the hallway woke her up. She was fast asleep. Sleeping a dreamless night even without a thought. Unusual for Noodle, but she enjoyed it at the very most. But she was on the couch last night. Wasn't she? She opened her tired eyes and glanced around at her surroundings. She was in her room. It was still lazily un-cleaned, and clothes still laying all over. Noodle sighed at the mess remembering that she would have to clean it later because of the procrastinating of yesterday. She groggily got up out of bed, and walked down to the kitchen to meet the rest of the band. She counted every small step and after 43 steps she was there, getting her breakfast, and sitting down. But suddenly it hit her when she glanced into his eyes. His hung-over, love stricken eyes. It was real. She _was_ on the couch last night. She _did_ see him kiss that girl.

"Hey Noods are you okay," 2D asked irrelevantly. Noodle glanced down at her half eaten cereal then back up at 2D.

"Yeah, I'm okay, its just that," Noodle cut herself off know that if she just came out and said that 2D had a girl over last night that Russel would be a little more than upset on his scale. Russel more than got the hint and added himself into the conversation, "What is it Noodle, honestly baby girl come out and say it," Murdoc knew what Noodle was going to say and shot a glace at 2D that was screaming I told you not to bring her home! "It's honestly nothing Russel," Noodles face grew red from her intendancy of not being able to tell a lie. The stale air hung between all four of the band mates, and was broken by 2D cheerily saying, "I've got a girlfriend. Noodle caught me kissing her last night. Is that what is bothering you Noods?" Noodle shocked grew even redder in the face and said, "I told you guys _nothing_ is bothering me! 2D, if you kissed a girl or have a girlfriend you should know I'm fine because that is no different news than it usually is! You _always_ are bringing girls home or you have a new girlfriend you 'think' that would be old news to me after seven years 2D? Well its not!" On that last note Noodle got up offensively from the table half ran half stomped down to her room and slammed the door with a sudden hate.

Harsh tears struck in her eyes and she tried so hard to not let them come out. "Your okay, your okay Noodle," She tried to console herself. "2D is only going to have that girl for about a week just like the rest of them. He will get tired of her, and she will be tired of him going to bars pretty much every night. It will happen. Just wait, just..," She laid herself across her bed and closed her eyes. Once again she fell into a dreamless sleep not hearing a thing that was going on. After Noodle left all Russel could do was look at 2D. Not in hate or anger but in question.

"Your hurting her you know, 2D." 2D glanced away from his food and up at Russel. "What do you mean Russ? She just said she was used to this. I love Melissa this time she is not just some girl. Russel rolled his eyes at the word some-girl. "2D, she likes you. Not just as her band mate or brother. She likes you like well a love actually cant you see that?" Murdoc was the one to roll his eyes as he got up from to table and stated, " Well this conversation seems like it's between you two blokes, I'm out. Then adding, "Remember we have practice in a few hours, and I _expect_ you all to be there." Glancing awkwardly in Murdoc's direction then back at Russel 2D questioned, "How do you know that Russ, that she likes me more than that." Russel leaned over the wide table across to 2D to whisper in a dull roar, "How can you not tell 2D? Sometimes I think you are so caught up in what you are doing to notice anything about her. Plus she tells me mostly everything that goes on her life, and if not I can already tell what is." Russel shook his head at the stricken 2D got up to was his dish and left the room leaving the singer dumbfounded.

2D sat at the table for what seemed for him quite a while. Thinking about Russel just told him for just about two minutes before he picked up his blackberry and called Melissa. "Hello." A sweet sounding voice answered on the other line. "Um hey Melissa I was wondering if you wanted to go out tonight. Like to dinner and a movie?" There was a pause on the other line, and then a thrilled voice replied, "Oh 2D I would love to! What time?" 2D smiled and was glad that she wanted to go, "I will come pick you up around five tonight. Is that okay?" A cute giggle sounded on the other line and said, "Of course baby, that's okay I will see you later then?" 2D smiled and confirmed that she would and hung up his phone. His excitement grew inside of him. He loved Melissa. Her soft blue eyes, long dark brown hair, and curves any girl would die for. Plus she had a great personality, she was smart, and 2D knew she was one girl that wouldn't leave him for Murdoc. Plus she was a Christian so Murdoc wouldn't bother with her anyway. 2D glanced at the clock. It was 1 p.m, only one hour until the scheduled band practice. He just loved how Murdoc always found a way to schedule band practice when it was the least convenient, not for Murdoc, but for everyone else. With only in hour left of free time he decided to go down to is room, pop in a zombie flick, and just relax.

(An hour later)

All three members of the band were already in the studio and ready to go, but where was the fourth member? Murdoc was tired of waiting for the little axe princess to get her little butt down there so he went to go find her and make her give him a reasonable explanation about why she wasn't there 20 minutes ago! He walked down to the living room, the kitchen, the car park, and the theater. Only to find Noodle in the first place he should have checked, her room. She was asleep on her bed in her clothes and tears dried on her face and on her bed. "Noods, wake up we _have_ practice!" The axe princess fluttered her eyes open and stared at the tall, irritated man. "Mmm sorry Murdoc I fell asleep, I will get my guitar and be down there in two minutes I promise," Murdoc figured that was a good enough explanation and went back down to the studio. Noodle sighed grabbed her guitar and amp and followed behind Murdoc, knowing she will have to face 2D. But it was better sooner than later. She reached the studio and proceeded setting up her guitar and tuning it for the songs that they were going to play. She saw 2D, but he didn't look mad or put down at all. In fact he seemed overly happy. Maybe this new girl was good for him. Noodle didn't want to think about her right now though. Instead she turned her attention to 2D. "Hey 2D, I'm sorry for lashing out like that earlier, I don't know what got into me." 2D was appalled that she actually was speaking to him. "Eh its okay love, you were right about everything, I'm sorry." That's all Murdoc had to hear to start the practice. They played through _all_ their songs, some songs they did twice. Even from their B-sides and D-sides album. Towards the end of the session Noodle's fingers were blistering and were about to bleed, 2D's voice cracked more and more, and Murdoc started to miss notes. That's when Murdoc _finally_ ended the practice. Saying that they would have another practice the same time tomorrow.

It was four o'clock. Murdoc went to his Winnebago to drink or who knows what. Russel went to start making dinner. 2D went to go get ready for his date, and Noodle stayed in the studio and cried. She found out why 2D was in a hurry, a date with Melissa. She loved him so much! Couldn't he see that? Maybe he didn't like her in that way, or maybe he did. Who knows. Whichever the answer was she would have to stay strong and stick out the storm that was coming her way. If she could fight off the zombies that wandered into Kong by using her own two hands (with the help of her scythe). Then she could handle this. Noodle dried her tears and went to go help Russel in the kitchen make dinner probably just for the two of then tonight. It didn't seem like Murdoc would be joining then that night and 2D was going to be gone. "Ugh, I really need to talk to him." Noodle said out loud. "Need to talk to who baby girl?" Russel overheard. "Oh no one Russ." Noodle replied and decided tonight after 2D came home would be the perfect time.

_So we've been outnumbered_

_Raided and now cornered_

_It's hard to fight when the fight ain't fair_

_We're getting stronger now_

_Find things they never found_

_They might be bigger_

_But we're faster and never scared_

_You can walk away, say we don't need this_

_But there's something in your eyes_

_Says we can beat this_

_Because these things will change_

_Do you feel it now?_

**-Taylor Swift: Change**

Erika Note: Ok chapter 2 is done! I hope you liked it! **Please Review**! Tell me what you would like to see in the story! Oh and Melissa is an original character! Well yeah read and review THANKIES3


	3. These Four Walls

A/N: This chapter is going to be from 2D point of view in the beginning then Noodles just so you know!

______________________________________________________________________________________________

_These Four Walls they whisper to me _

_they know secret I knew they would not keep_

_Didn't take long for the room to fill with dust_

_And these four walls came down around us_

_Must of been something set me out of my head_

_With the words so radical_

_And not what I meant_

_Now wait for a break in the silence_

_Cause it's all that you left_

_Just me and these four walls again_

_**Miley Cyrus: These Four Walls**_

Before he knew it the time on his blackberry said 4:45 p.m. 2D's heart was racing madly throughout this whole chest. This is what he had been looking forward to this whole day. Seeing Melissa. He truly cared about her. Every time he sees her, his hands get sweaty, he feels the butterfly's swarming around in his stomach, and he can't look at anyone in the room besides her. Even when he was dating Paula, or Rachel he never felt like this. He jumped off his bed and ran into his bathroom to make sure he cleaned up well. He was taking her to eat at 'Tres Fantaisie' to eat and then they were going to go see a movie at the cinema. He glanced in the mirror. He was all right. None of his hair was out of place, his face was clean, and he looked good! He went back into his room to grab another pair of clothes to change into. He didn't have to search that long until he found a black button up dress shirt and a pair of dark blue jeans. He tried the outfit and decided he looked good enough. Seeing that it was now 4:50 he ran out to the car park got into his black truck and left to go get Melissa. Murdoc apparently used the car last the ashtray was full of used, smelly cigarettes and there was a hard rock CD blaring in the CD player. 2D pulled out the CD turning it to something more suitable, and empted the contents of the ashtray out the window. Once again changing the CD because he wasn't satisfied. It was Noodle's favorite CD. Some Japanese band. As he was driving he turned up the music so it drowned out all his senses. Melissa didn't live too far away from Kong so it didn't take 2D long to reach her house. He smoothly rounded the last corner and turned into a neighborhood. It was pretty nice just like where he used to live. Her house was the fifth house on the left of Addison Avenue. It was a tan house with green grass, and flowers planted on the outside. The house also had a veranda around it and a hot tub in the back. Well 2D knew that from a previous experience. He got out of the car and he could feel those butterflies more and more with each step closer he got to the house.

He went up and knocked on the door. His heart hammering in his chest so hard that if it got any harder it would of jumped out of his pale skin. He heard her footsteps coming towards the door. It opened. "2D," Melissa said with shining eyes as she pulled him into an astonishing kiss. The world spun around, and fireworks shot high up into the sky every time she kissed him. It felt like there was no one else in the world. The kiss broke to soon. "Are you ready to go, love?" 2D asked still dizzy from his kissing encounter. "Yeah, let me just go get my coat," Melissa smiled then adding, "You can come in if you wish." 2D smiled back in gratitude and walked into her home he had been in before. Her living room looked as if it was out of a home interior magazine. Nothing like Kong. Her living room had a couch, and to love seats, a flat screen T.V, and an old piano. A delicate old coffee table was the centerpiece of the room. Made out of old dark wood, and had a vase of the flowers 2D gave her the other night. Melissa came back out of the other room, grabbed her purse then came over and gave 2D a hug. Then he looked into her eyes and once again they were the only people in the world. They broke away from the kiss and headed towards 2D's car. 2D opened the door for her and helped her in. Then went around to his side climbed in himself and started the car. On the way to the restaurant they had a general conversation about their day, the weather, and whatever else protruded from their mouths. But the whole way to the restaurant 2D could not stop thinking about how beautiful she looked that night. She was dressed in a short, sleeveless black dress with a bright blue skinny belt tied around her waist that matched the color of 2D's hair. But 2D couldn't help himself to wonder, what is I don't really like _her_. What if I only like the fact that she is pretty, and that Murdoc won't take her from me? We talk, but it is nothing new. Just the same kind of talking, and the same subjects each time. Then 2D started thinking about Noodle. She was perfect. Why couldn't he see that before? She was truly different than any other girl. Not only did Noodle like him, he liked her too. 2D pushed his thoughts out of his mind as the big, black truck pulled into a parking space in front of the restaurant.

Reservations For Stuart Tusspot it said on their table. Which was outside by a romantic pond and was lighted by a flickering candlelight. He could see that Melissa was thrilled. Her blue eyes lighted up when she saw where they were sitting. "2D, it's so beautiful!" 2D didn't respond. He kissed her hand and pulled out her seat for her. Melissa laughed, "Are we being a gentleman tonight 2D?" 2D smiled back, "That's what I was aiming for." Not much later their waiter came took their orders. 2D ordered some chicken fettuccine alfredo, and Melissa ordered the same. When their orders came 2D's mind wandered again. Why wasn't he feeling anything right now? He was earlier, but ever since he started thinking about the relationship he started feeling less and less for her. "Your bill sir." The tired sounding waiter announced. 2D glanced in his direction, "Huh, oh yeah here you go." He handed him his debit card and the waiter nodded and went to go run it through the machine. He noticed Melissa staring at him. He looked at her and smiled. "Stuart." She asked, "I..," Melissa was interrupted by the waiter, "Here's your bill Mr. Tusspot." Melissa and 2D both returned the smile to the waiter than Melissa continued, "Stuart, I love you." 2D couldn't find the words to say. He was shocked. He liked her, but he was not sure it was love, at least not anymore. But the singer thought that he would spare the girls feelings tonight. "I love you to Melissa." He choked out, and managed to smile. This just felt all wrong saying he loved her when he really didn't. Plus the fact that now he could not stop thinking about Noodle. He rushed Melissa back out to the car to avoid the paparazzi, shut her door once again and drove them to the cinema. They went to see a scary movie. It wasn't as good as he had hoped. It had the same plot as every other scary movie. But Melissa liked it so that's all that mattered to him. That she had a fun time. After the movie he drove her back to her house gave her a sweet goodnight kiss and drove back to Kong.

Noodle was worried. Why wasn't 2D home by now. She new that they were going out to dinner and to a movie but she didn't know if mattress dancing was going to be involved tonight. She really needed to talk to 2D alone. No Murdoc or Russel breathing down her neck. She needed to tell 2D the truth, even if he already knew. Which she was pretty sure he didn't because he has been so caught up in Melissa lately. It didn't even seem like 2D was himself lately. "Still not home at 1 am god," Noodle complained and flipped through the TV guide to see what was on. She finally decided on some reality show where a girl was trying to find a best friend. It was acted out lame, but Noodle enjoyed it. Trash TV. One thing Russel didn't like her watching. She heard a click of the door. She didn't care who was coming up to find her watching TV 'at this hour'. But at the corner of her eye that it was 2D. Just to make sure she turned her whole face to look at him with her piercing emerald eyes. "We need to talk," Noodle sighed and led 2D down the hall and into her still messy room. The first thing that 2D said when he got to her room was, "Wow, Noodle this is so unusual for you, your room is so messy!" Noodle rolled her eyes and scoffed, "Yeah I know I need to clean it I have been procrastinating." Then added, "But that's not the reason I needed to talk to you 2D. The reason is well I like you, not just like an older brother or a close friend, but like well you know like a boyfriend." Noodle abruptly finished. 2D gazed at her with wonder in his eyes. He was appalled that she could just come out and say it like that. He couldn't have. Before he has time to speak Noodle began to speak again, "I know you are in _love_ with Melissa, but I just wanted you to know how I feel. 2D I really care about you whether we are just friends or more than that. I guess I have always cared for you in that way, but not as strongly as I do now. And I would just like to know if there are any feelings for me inside you at all? Or if I am just _some girl_. And if there is something there for me 2D, I don't just want to jump right into things. I would want to take it slow like a true relationship." Noodle stopped short of breath. 2D was amazed that Noodle was holding all of that inside of her, because so was he. He never thought that she liked him that way until Russel told him that might be the case. 2D was thrilled he didn't know whether to hug her, or to kiss her. He hugged her. He was filled so much with joy he forgot all about Melissa. Not a thought in his mind was about her. Which is relevant to the point where Noodle said that would happen. "Noods, I feel the same way. Even today when I was with Melissa I couldn't stop thinking about you and I realized that Melissa and I only talk about the same stuff everyday and I have no idea what I saw in that relationship." 2D pulled away from the hug.

Noodle looked at him with her striking emerald eyes. She was beautiful. Her plum colored hair was down a little past her shoulders and was the slightest messy. Her make-up was half on and half off from today's events, but she still looked every bit of pretty that Melissa was when she was fixed up. "2D-san, I was holding that in for so long. I was afraid if I told you, you would laugh. Or that it could be worse and you couldn't return the feelings and even our friendship would be ruined." 2D understood how she felt. He had felt the same way many times before. "Noodle, I think it is time that you go to bed." Noodle looked at him with question in her eyes, "I would 2D, but I'm afraid when I wake up this will all be a dream." 2D didn't take no for an answer and laid Noodle down on her bed covered her up and snuggled up next to her on the outside of her covers. "Would you like me to sing you to sleep, love?" Noodle enjoying every little detail of her surroundings in the moment responded, "Will you sing my song?" 2D beamed he knew exactly what song she meant. He started her lullaby. El Manana. And that night she fell asleep in his arms.

_Yeah it's difficult_

_Wacthin us fade_

_Knowing it's all my fault_

_My mistake_

_Yeah it's difficult_

_Letting you down_

_Knowing it's all my fault_

_You're not around_

_Must of been something set me out of my head_

_With the words so radical_

_And not what I meant_

_Now wait for a break in the silence_

_Cause it's all that you left_

_Just me and these four walls again_

_Again_

_**-Miley Cyrus: These Four Walls**_

Erika Note: Okay so chapter 3 eh? HAHA okay so this is where things are really going to start heating up. It will bring everyone up, knock them down, and then knock them down again harder. Believe me! Woo these next few chapters are going to be fun for me to write! I'm going into a school week so things will be going a little bit slower, but not much so please hang in there with me! Oh and the song El Manana is by the Gorillaz I DO NOT own that song the lyrics or Gorillaz. Ok well funny story I'm in Spanish and I was listening to El Manana on my IPod and my Spanish teacher saw and told me the translation of that song means Tomorrow. I just thought it would be a perfect lullaby for Noodle! Well please **read and review**. Thankies3


	4. The Best Day

Chapter 4

A/N: Okay so this is when everything is going to fall in place before the big crash! And you will see that that is in further chapters! The worst is yet to come!! Read and Review?

_I'm thirteen now and don't know how_

_My friends could be so mean_

_I come home crying and you hold me tight_

_And grab the keys_

_And we drive until we found a town_

_Far enough away_

_And we talk and window shop 'til I've forgotten_

_All their names_

_I don't know who I'm gonna talk to now at school_

_But I know I'm laughing on the car ride_

_Home with you_

_Don't know how long its gonna take to feel okay_

_But I know I had the best day with you today_

_**Taylor Swift: Best Day**_

Plink, Plink. Noodle heard the serene sound of the monstrous raindrops hitting the roof. She looked up in delight. She loved the rain. Especially in the mornings. Then she looked at the snoring heap of blankets beside her. 2D. He was so cute when he slept. His blue hair was all messy and his face was so soft and calm, like a sleeping baby's. Noodle bent down and kissed his soft lips, and just like in all fairytales his eyes fluttered open, and returned Noodle's kiss. "Good morning, love." He whispered. Noodles face flashed a pink shade and she looked away shyly. "2D." Noodle asked in a soft sweet voice. "Yes, love?" 2D asked back. Noodle smiled and proposed, "Do you want to go to the back today?" 2D took a few moments to decide if he had anything going on, and when he decided he didn't he replied, "Yes Noods I would love to! Just let me take care of some business first and then we will be on our way!" Noodle gave him a slight nod then ushered him out of her room so that she could get ready, and gather the items she would need. 2D smiled when he got out of her room and beat the temptation the open the door by 'accident'. He used the lift to get down into the filthy car park and then used the door to get into his somewhat clean room. He opened the door causally afraid it would shatter, and walked to his bed to get his cell phone that he left there last night. He pushed speed dial 5 and it called the person he needed to talk to most right now. "Hey could you come over to Kong for a few minutes I need to talk to you." He scoffed out waiting for an answer. "Uh, yeah I guess." The other voice on the line replied. 2D rolled his eyes, "Good, just use the back door. I don't want anyone to see you coming here." And with that his long index finger pressed end call. He sat on the bed not knowing what time the person would get there, but then decided to take a shower to pass the time. Also, because he hadn't taken one since the night before. So he staggered into his cramped bathroom turned on the hot water and got in. The hot water felt so good to him. Noodles room is always about 20 degrees below zero at night and he was freezing. He picked up his shampoo bottle, squeezed out the right amount, and lathered it all throughout his hair. Rinsed it out being careful not to get any shampoo in his eyes as he usually does. He was about to do conditioner when he heard his door open and close and a voice calling his name. Afraid of whom it could be he gracefully got out of his shower and wrapped a single towel around his waist. Making sure that none of his unmentionables were in plain sight.

"Hello?" A confused Stu-pot asked. Then he could see the shadow of the unknown figure. It was a girl with curves, curled hair, and voluptuous high heels on. "2D you asked me to come over here. Are you alright?" A perplexed Melissa asked. "Oh yeah uh just one moment Melissa." 2D apologized as he ran into the bathroom to actually put clothes on instead of the ever slipping towel. He returned from the bathroom three minute later, and was prepared to pick his poison. "Yeah Melissa the reason why I wanted to see you all of a sudden is that I just.." Melissa interrupted him, "2D, before you say anything I have to say something. I think this is not working. I mean we are not working. It seems like this relationship is going no where for us and the honest truth is I wasn't only seeing you but two other guys as well. I'm sorry I just like to play the field. And I felt bad because you are such a sweet, and honest guy." 2D was furious. She was cheating on him the whole time! This time he interrupted her, "Melissa, how could you do that? I mean I confess the reason why I invited you over here today was to dump you, but to cheat on me the whole time with two other guys? How low can you go? I had true feelings for you in the start. Melissa rolled her eyes annoyingly, "Well, _Stuart _it doesn't matter now anyway because you are just a drunk, low-life who…" 2D stopped her in her bitching action, "No, Melissa just go. You are the least of my worries goodbye." He banged his door open so hard that he was sure it fell of the hinges this time, but manages to survive. Melissa walked out with a final huff about how he was going to miss her and what not. Which was not true. He loved Noodle and it was going to stay that way.2D inspected his door for the second time just making sure that it was still going to be useable, and flopped down onto his bed trying to make his temper go down before he went upstairs to get Noodle.

Noodle was very excited that today she and 2D got to go to the beach alone! They could have gone before but just never had the devotion to. This time without Russel's eyes staring down her back every second she could wear what swimsuit that she wanted to wear. Not the one that he thinks she should wear. So she picked out the sexiest one she had. It was black and had a long cut out in the front that nearly reached her bellybutton, and two cut outs on the sides that left the swimsuit backless only a string that tied and two metal circles held it together. She usually wasn't comfortable around people in it, but she wanted to look especially good for 2D today. She went through the same routine as she did before and every other time she went to the beach and got her sunscreen, towel, and Prada sunglasses. All which matched her swimsuit. And since 2D wasn't up to her room yet she decided to clean up a little in her room. It was still messy from the last time she neglected to clean it and now had a fresh layer of clutter do to today's findings. She started with her clothes, because that was the majority of all the things on her floor. She picked up each shirt, pant, sweatshirts, pajamas, underclothes, and swimsuits, folded each one and put them into their right drawers. Next she picked up any book, CD, and other mismatched items and put them into their respectful place. Whether that be on the shelf, on her many CD racks, or in her bathroom. Lastly, she put all of her room furniture where it belonged, straightened up, and made her bed (A thing she rarely did).

Next was her bathroom. This actually didn't take as long as her room did. She took about roughly five minutes and she was done. Then Noodle herself flopped down onto her bed exhausted. Then she remembered what she was supposed to be doing. Going to the beach with 2D! Why wasn't he up in her room yet? Noodle sighed and chose to take matters into her own hands and go down into his room to see what was taking him so long. She walked down the corridor and down to the lobby to take the lift down to the car park. Usually the elevator is usually faster than taking the stairs right? Well, not Kong's elevator. It usually takes about two minutes to get to the lobby from its previous location, opens and takes two minutes of jumping down to you designated location. The elevator was actually a pretty scary ride. Noodle had to learn to take the stairs more often. She kept note of that. Noodle entered the elevator and pressed the button that meant that it would take her down to the car park. One jump, two jump, three jumps. "Ah." Noodle gave a quick screech, as the elevator didn't do a jump but a leap to its last stop. Walking of the elevator a little shaken Noodle gambled over to 2D's room. Knocked and then opened the door. 2D was laying on his bed in a trance like state throwing a rubber ball at the ceiling then letting it fall smoothly into his awaiting hand. "Hey 2D, I was wondering when you were planning to go to the beach with me?" 2D looked over in Noodles direction remembering that he told her he would take her, "Right now Noodle, love. Sorry it took so long. I called Melissa to come over here, and I let her go. Turns out she was cheating on me the whole time with two other guys! And I had no idea. But don't worry that doesn't matter now. Just let me get a few things together, and we will be on our way. He shot a smile that said I love you and went to go get his items for the beach adding them into the striped bag that Noodle had brought down with her. "Ok 2D-san. What car are we going to be taking, I can go wait there?" 2D was examining a pair of swim trunks at the time and replied, "The Jeep." Noodle nodded grabbed her bag and went to go wait for 2D in the car.

This time 2D did not keep Noodle waiting as long and met her in the car. They were both really excited to be going together, but out of the two Noodle was a little more excited. She couldn't wait to show 2D the magic of the ocean, how powerful it was, and what it could compel you to do. Plus there was the satisfaction of sharing that experience with 2D. She wanted to know him as much as she could, more than other girls he had previously dated. Well they only knew him well in bed anyway. Noodle felt a little embarrassed, but she wanted to know him in that way too. The couple spent the whole ride to the beach listening to their records and screaming out all the lyrics to each other. Laughing when amazingly someone got the lyrics wrong. " This is what a relationship should be like," 2D thought to himself and grinned. He always had so much fun with Noodle, and was happy that he could spend more time with her now as a couple. There was only one fault that he could think of. He hasn't told Murdoc, and Russel about the relationship yet. 2D was not sure how the two men would take it. They, of course, will want to protect Noodle and wont want her getting hurt in any way. Which is understandable because well she was Russel's little girl, and Murdoc just 'cared' about her. He would have to tell them both soon; it would be better the sooner he told them. For Noodles sake, and his.

They were just about to the beach. Noodle could smell the salty air, and already hear the seagulls swarming above their head above the loud music that was still blasting from the Jeep's stereo. Her excitement was growing inside of her and she was just about to burst like a hyper dog that has been locked in a kennel all day and long to get out. And when the dog finally gets out it like a mini bomb went off. She enjoyed looking at all the sights on the way to the beach. The nice houses, rolling hills, then finally the sight of the pure white sand. 2D found a parking space not to far from where they always park, and they headed down the path to the ocean. 2D had forgotten how beautiful it was there. He hadn't been there in some time and actually missed it. The ocean used to be the hang out spot for the band, but lately everyone was staying close to Kong. None of them, besides Noodle, haven't wanted to go here for years. There was nothing wrong with it. So 2D never understood why they never went. But he was glad that Noodle dragged him here today. Hand in hand 2D and Noodle walked they finished walking the path from the parking lot down to the beach. The pure white sand was hot under their feet, and there was no breeze out that day. The perfect day to go to the beach! That would explain why so many families with loud obnoxious kids, and passionate lovers were there. It was the perfect getaway without having to go so far from home. 2D and Noodle walked down to the water and stuck their feet in. It felt so good. The waves would come up and grasp their ankles with its alluring motion and lead them in closer into the water as if to swallow them up like a giant sea monster. Noodle turned to 2D. She was compelled to get into the water at least to her waist. She took off her flowing white sundress held it in her left hand above her head and ran into the beckoning, clear blue ocean. It felt so good. Pretty soon she was in all the way up to her petite shoulders, and that's when 2D finally decided to follow her lead and come in closer to the awaiting ocean. When he got to where Noodle was in the water, the water only reached to his chest. He laughed, and picked up Noodle throwing her up into the air and letting the ocean swallow her up like a human would swallow food. She arrived to the surface a few moments later, then went back down to be swallowed again, but this time bringing 2D with her. It was just like in a movie. She could hear the crashing waves above their heads now as her and 2D grabbed for each other's lips. They met. They circled around each other as they were kissing their hair flowing all around them. Hands grabbed at each other's waists, and legs became intertwined. Not a fish, plant, or animal was alive in the ocean right then. It was just they. Only them.

The surface of the ocean broke. 2D and Noodle emerged panting, and grasping for air from their breath-taking kiss. 2D smiled at her, and her heart stopped. She felt like taking him under for another round. But decided against it when she remembered what she wanted to take him here for. The rock, her rock. It was low tide and the perfect time to show him he favorite place other than being in his arms. She led him out of the water to dry off as much as they could. The sun would do the rest of the drying. Now, just noticing that her sundress was soaked from taking it under-water with her, by accident. She put her sundress, her towel, 2D's towel, and his wet shirt into her bag and they began their journey to Noodle's rock. Usually, there would be tons of paparazzi around, or noisy teenagers taking pictures of the two of them but today there was only 2 or 3. Noodle guessed the word hadn't gotten out yet and more annoyances would show up later. Noodle didn't understand why the paparazzi always had to be in everyone's business. Why couldn't they be normal like everyone else? You wouldn't just go out and take pictures of random people would you? The couple still had roughly a 30-minute walk until they reached their destination. They both were getting hungry and thirsty so they vowed to stop at the next hot-dog stand they saw. Luckily for them that wasn't too far away they could see one in the distance. Even though usually 2D didn't eat hog-dogs, he chose to eat one today because it was probably the only thing he would find to eat on the beach today. The duo kept walking until they reached the hot-dog stand talking about life, past experiences, their band mates, and about each other. 2D ordered two hot-dogs, and two waters from the hot dog vendor and they continued walking while they ate. Being careful not to drop their food in the dancing sand. They continued their chat, but something caught Noodles eye. It was her rock! They were so close! And it was the perfect time to be there! The wouldn't have to walk out so deep to reach the part where Noodle climbed up on, and they would have plenty of time before high tide came in. Caught up in her excitement Noodle started to run towards the rock. Leaving 2D to catch up with her. It didn't take him as long as Russel to get there, he was right behind her. 2D was happy just seeing Noodle this happy. It had been a long time since he has seen her this happy for more than a few minutes long. She has been smiling the whole time they have been at the beach and continued to do so.

The rock was calling Noodle to come out. The tide was so low that Noodle would be able to climb between the rock next to it to play in the tide-pool and to stick her fingers at the amazing sea life that would be before her. Noodle grabbed 2D's hands with a automatic force and dragged him out into the water and showed him how to climb onto this rock. It wasn't too hard for 2D for his first time because he was taller. But when Noodle first tried to get onto that rock many, many years ago it took her almost an hour to figure out where to place her feet. When she finally got onto the rock for the first time she was bleeding, and was bruised up so bad that Murdoc thought that he would have to take his guitarist to the hospital. Not something Murdoc would be proud to do. This time Noodle got up onto her rock on the second try. Not bleeding. Not even a scratch, maybe a bruise or two, but no blood! Then Noodle climbed down in-between the rocks went down to a lower flat rock, and found the tide-pool she was looking for. It was alive with so many colors! There was mini crabs, an array of colored starfish, sea anemone, and some lazy sea cucumbers. It was beautiful. She asked 2D to come down to her. He went down the opposite way to sit across from her and also because it's the only way a six-foot man could fit. They played with the live animals, got pinched but the tiny crabs a few times, and even stuck starfish to their arms and hands. About an hour later when high tide started to come in, and all the sea life was going to sleep, Noodle and 2D climbed back up onto the atrocious rock. This time 2D helped boost Noodle up so that she wouldn't break her neck. The best part about her rock was, no one went there. There was no tourists, obnoxious kids, or rowdy teenagers to deal with. Just the three of them. Noodle, 2D, and the ocean, a true living creature. The wind was starting to pick up now so there was just the slightest of a breeze. Noodle stood up on the rock. It felt like the Titanic! The wind was just heavy enough to blow her lightweight hair away from her face. Noodle let the wind caress her making her swimsuit give a little pull. Like she was flying. 2D spread his arms out for balance and stood up behind Noodle and moved them down to old her waist. Now it was officially the perfect picture. She looked up at his eyes, tilted her head back, and let herself be kissed tenderly on her full lips. The pull away from the kiss was so soft and so slow, definitely like it should have been in a movie.

The wind swept though the couples hair and caressed their faces. 2D and Noodle felt the spray of the ocean against their lower body, and the menacing seagulls were right above them. They kissed again. This time the kiss was longer and more forceful. Noodle knew what she wanted. "2D," She asked. 2D took time to gaze in her emerald eyes to see right into her, "Yes, love?" Noodle grinned and took in a deep breath, "I think I'm ready, tonight." 2D grinned knowing exactly what she was applying too, then nodded, "If you are ready, love, I am ready," Then tilted Noodle's head back for one last breath-taking kiss.

_Now I know why all the trees change in the fall_

_I know you were on my side even when I was wrong_

_And I love you for giving me your eyes_

_Staying back and watching me shine_

_And I didn't know if you knew_

_So I'm taking this chance to say that_

_I had the best day with you_

_Today_

_**Taylor Swift: The Best Day**_

Erika Note: Ok OHMYGOSH! That wasn't even supposed to be a long chapter at all. I mean I thought it would be very short! WOW. Haha the reason I mention the tide-pools is because last summer I went to the Oregon coast and that's exactly how it was! And yes me and my friend had a rock that you could only get to on low tide. Well please **read and review ^_^**!

And if you have any questions feel free to message me!


	5. First Day Of My Life

A/N: Ok this might be the smallest chapter (?) like I said last chapter was supposed to be really short but it wasn't! Far from actually! Well hope you enjoy!

_This is the first day of my life,_

_Swear I was born right in the doorway,_

_I went out in the rain suddenly everything changed,_

_They're spreading blankets on the beach_

_Yours is the first face that I saw,_

_Think I was blind before I met you,_

_And I don't know where I am, I don't know where I've been,_

_But I know where I want to go,_

_And so I thought I'd let you know_

_Yeah these things take forever,_

_I especially am slow,_

_But I realized that I need you,_

_And I wondered if I could come home_

_**-Bright Eyes: First Day Of My Life**_

It took them no time to get back to Kong. 2D knew all the back roads to go on, and of course he just went 'a little' higher than the speed limit. 2D parked the Jeep inside the car park and Noodle and him went straight into 2D's room. They had been at the beach the whole day and now it was nighttime. Besides, 2D knew that if he went upstairs with Noodle at this time that Russel would question him to death. And 2D didn't need that. At least not tonight. Noodle had just told him that tonight was going to be the night. She was loosing it to him! He quickly re-made his bed with clean, new sheets, pillows, blankets, and waited for Noodle to get out of she shower. She insisted that she took one, so he had let her use his shower; good thing he just cleaned his bathroom the other day. He heard the water stop. He began to get excited, and nervous. But why was he nervous? He had done this so many times before he developed a routine for it. He just cared for Noodle so much, and wanted to make sure that she wanted to. Noodle walked out of her bathroom and grinned a pearly white smile, "How to I look?" 2D was un-able to speak. She was wearing deep purple lingerie with a white satin bow tied around her waist. "You, you look amazing, love!" 2D managed to stammer out. Noodle smiled again, and pushed 2D onto his bed kissing him a little on his neck then moving to his lips. Then everything fell into place just like how 2D wanted it to. "Are you sure you are ready Noods?" He asked seductively in her ear. Noodle breathed in deep, "Yes, 2D I love you!" And on that note 2D began their first night.

Murdoc walked up to the kitchen, grabbed another cold beer then walked back down to his Winnebago. He had nothing planned tonight. Just him, his beer, and reality TV. "I wonder if face-ache is home yet?" Murdoc grumbled to himself. He ambled over to 2D's room and opened the door to see if 2D was in his room. "Holy Hannah!" Murdoc said quietly to himself and shut 2D's door without the in-the-mood couple noticing. Murdoc batted his eyes a few times to get the image out of his head. "I'd do that," He thought to himself once more. Noodle was pretty hot looking to him right then. "I wonder if they are dating," Murdoc scoffed and turned on his heel to go to his dirty Winnebago. He unbolted his door then locked it behind him flopping down on one of the couches, and turning on the TV. There was nothing good on. A show about men becoming better, a dating show, another dating show, and a show about spoiled teen's birthday parties. Frustrated Murdoc threw the fragile remote and busted it against the opposite wall. "Shit," He yelled and slammed his hand down on the side table. He much rather go watch 2D and Noodle be in 'the mood' anyway. "Dang," he thought, "Russel would kill 2D if he knew." He laughed, "No, no I'm not going to tell him. I will let Russel find out for himself. It will be more entertaining for me." And took another swig of his beer. Then another sip, and another, until he was finished with five beers and passed out on the uncomfortable couch.

"Hmm," Noodle sighed as she awoke to the bright sun blaring through 2D's naked window. She tried to sit up. "Ugh, why is my stomach hurting so bad?" She asked herself in a microscopic whisper. She sat up clutching her stomach for a few good minutes. Then thinking, "Maybe, I just have to throw up," And pulled back the covers to get out. With one shakily hand she touched what seemed to be blood on the bed. Noodle rolled her eyes, "Of course, I lost my virginity," She laughed silently, "Well, I guess I know where it went." Noodle no longer had the desire to get up. She laid back down on the bed not caring about the bloodstain; she was more tired than anything. Last night was a late night. Before drifting off to sleep again she heard a faint knock on 2D's door. Noodle re-opened her sleepy eyes. "Well good morning baby girl! I was wondering why you weren't up in your room last night!" Noodle was in a sleep deprived trace state that she almost she forgot that she was talking to Russel, "Oh yeah, well me and 2D had fun last night then," She looked at whom it was then continued making herself sound innocent, "I fell asleep in the car on the way home, so I guess 2D just put me here for tonight." Being careful that she didn't pull back the covers to expose her in her lingerie. That would be a dead giveaway. "Well I am glad you had fun yesterday Noodle girl," Russel said cheerfully, "It is always great when you can get someone out of the house with you." Noodle nodded and told Russel she would be up for breakfast in a few minutes. "Ah, there has to be something I can take for my stomach!" Noodle grumbled, and found what she was looking for on 2D's night table. A bottle of painkillers. Noodle knew that 2D took two, but he was bigger and weighed more than her so she decided to only take one. Hopefully it would not make her sick. She got up out of the soft, warm bed and walked into 2D's bathroom. She reached for and turned on the faucet on cold and waited for the water to actually turn cold. After one minute of doubling over in pain the water was finally cold enough for her standard. She bent over sucked in a mouthful of cool water popped in the bitter tasting pill. Making a face she managed to get the huge pill down her throat forcefully. "Ugh," she groaned as she felt the pill slowly sliding down her throat. She looked at herself in the mirror, and then went back to lay down with 2D.

Noodle laid down carefully on the bed. "Good morning, babe!" Noodle heard and she turned around. It was 2D. "Good morning 2D-san," Noodle grinned and then added, "Oh yeah by the way we cannot let Russel or Murdoc find out about this. Russel would freak out and Murdoc would just tell Russel." 2D groaned. He just remembered what he was going to have to do that day. He would tell Russel, but not while Noodle was around. "Maybe I can get Murdoc to take Noodle shopping today," 2D thought, "That would get then out of the house so I could talk to Russel." 2D liked his plan. "Hey Noods," 2D asked, "Would you want to go shopping with Murdoc today?" Noodle thought this over. She did need new clothes, and she hasn't really been around Murdoc in a while, so why not? Noodle nodded, "Yes I would like to 2D-san," Then adding, "Are you sure Murdoc is fine with it?" 2D nodded back, "Yep, he is Noodle." Noodle nodded one last time then kissed 2D on the forehead. "I love you 2D-san!"

_And you said this is the first day of my life,_

_I'm glad I didn't die before I met you,_

_But now I don't care I could go anywhere with you,_

_And I'd probably be happy_

_So if you want to be with me,_

_With these things there's no telling,_

_We just have to wait and see_

_But I'd rather be working for a paycheck,_

_Than waiting to win the lottery,_

_Besides maybe this time it's different,_

_I mean I really think you like me_

_**-Bright Eyes: First Day Of My Life**_

Erika Note: Okay so that was a pretty short chapter. So chapter 6 is where it is all going to heat up! YAY! I have been waiting to write these next few chapters! So I hope you all like the story so far, and please **read and review**. And again I do not own the Gorillaz at all. Thank you. And if you have any questions feel free to message me!


	6. Lover I Don't Have To Love

A/N: Okay so this is chapter 6! Where everything is going to change and break loose! Woo I hope you like it!

_I picked you out,_

_Of a crowd and talked to you._

_Said I liked your shoes,_

_You said, "Thanks, Can I follow you?"_

_So it's up the stairs,_

_And out of view._

_No prying eyes._

_I poured some wine._

_I asked your name;_

_You asked the time._

_Now it's two o'clock._

_The club is closed,_

_We're up the block._

_Your hands on me,_

_Pressing hard against your jeans,_

_Your tongue in my mouth,_

_Trying to keep the words from coming out._

_You didn't care to know._

_Who else may have been you before._

_**-Bright Eyes: Lover I Don't Have To Love**_

"So Noodle what mall do you want to go to," A somewhat cheerful Murdoc asked. Noodle looked at him like he was out of his mind, "Just the mall Murdoc. What other mall is there?" Murdoc shook off his thoughts eagerly, "I don't know, love, I was just seeing what you would say." Noodle laughed and got into the Jeep after Murdoc. From Kong it was about a half an hour drive through the city. The band didn't travel this way that often so Noodle embraced the city. She always loved going there, but none of the guys really ever wanted to go. "Dang, I can't wait until I can drive," Noodle thought, "I'm sixteen, but Russel still hasn't let me get my drivers license yet. He is just too overprotective." Noodle then remembering that Russel was going to have a fit when he found out about her and 2D. Murdoc laughed, "So I saw you little rendezvous last night." Noodle was shocked, "What, Murdoc?" Murdoc rolled his eyes and continued looking at the stretch of road before them, "Well you know Noodle your little fiasco." Noodle grew really red in the face. Did he just say that he saw them? No, he couldn't have. Noodle replied, "Murdoc I don't know what you are talking about unless you tell me straight forward." Murdoc made another laugh from deep inside his throat, "Well I saw you and 2D mattress dancing!" Murdoc let yet another laugh leave his throat. Noodle looked and him in embarrassment, and in question then let all of her questions free at once, "Where did you see us? How did u see us? Did you tell Russel? How do you even know it was I? Why did you look? Does 2D know this yet?" Murdoc rolled his mismatched eyes back into his head, "Of course I saw you two in his bed, and I opened 2D's door. No, I didn't tell Russel I was going to let you tell him, and hunny you just told me it was you. Noods, I didn't mean to look I was looking in 2D's room to see if you guys were back yet, and no 2D does not know this yet." He finished out of breath. Noodle was on the verge of crying. She didn't want anyone else to see! Now she would have to tell Russel because she knew if 2D or herself angered Murdoc in any way he would let it 'slip' that her and 2D had did that. Murdoc saw that he had made Noodle upset, "Aw Noods, I'm sorry, and that's why I wanted to take you shopping today, so I could buy you whatever you wanted without Russel dictating what you can wear. Of course we will have to get some things that he will agree with, but we don't have to show him everything we get, right?" Noodle smiled, "Thank you, Murdoc, that is very kind of you and I am so glad that I will actually get to dress like my age now," She laughed, "And we are definitely not showing Russel everything that I get."

The rest of the car ride to the mall was in silence. Neither Noodle nor Murdoc let anymore sound escape their throats. Mostly, Noodle was soaking up the sights. The tall brown houses, which had their roofs at an exact peak, and all the front lawns were so perfect like they should belong in a gardening magazine. And the skyscrapers that were so tall, and some so unstable that Noodle feared that if she sneezed they would all come tumbling down like a house made out of a deck of cards. Among the brown houses, and the tall skyscrapers was the mall. It was the biggest mall around. The outside looked like it belonged with the rest of the pretty, shiny buildings in L.A or somewhere more magical then England. It was so big, that if you took all the big fountains, restaurants, kids play places, and the stores out of it and you put only beds all over in the mall, everybody in England could sleep there. This was Noodle's favorite mall. Whenever she could go shopping she always wanted to go here. No other mall could compare with this one. The camouflage Jeep drove into one of the huge parking garages and found a good parking spot. Right next to one of the many skywalk entrances into the mall. Noodle and Murdoc walked across the skywalk into the mall and Noodle had instant excitement. She breathed in the scent of new clothes, designer shoes, and the scent of food being made. She saw one of her favorite stores and dragged Murdoc in behind her. Since he promised to buy her anything she wanted she was going to have fun that day. She could get a whole new wardrobe, and new stuff for her room! The store was blaring some pop music, as Noodle dashed all around the crowded store finding clothes, shoes, and accessories that she liked and that were her size. Murdoc was over by the sales counter hitting on some sales lady. Same old, same old. In a matter in minutes, Noodle had a hand full of clothes and asked a clerk to get her a dressing room. Then called Murdoc over because she wanted someone else's opinion besides her own.

The dressing room was nice. It had a long bench inside to either sit on, or lay clothes on. The bench was covered with leather looking material that was white. The floor was made of white cushiony, beige carpet that melted under the weight of Noodle's feet. The walls of the dressing room had vertical white and silver stripes running down them, and on the left side of the dressing room was a picture of a beautiful Japanese model wearing one of the shirts that she got to try on. The first outfit that Noodle tried on was the white shirt with light, painted flowers that moved down the shirt in a diagonal, pointed direction that the Japanese model was wearing in the picture. She also tried on a pair of dark blue skinny jeans that hugged her petite body, and illuminated her every curve. The jeans even gave her butt a little more volume. This was the first outfit that she had tired on, but so far it was her favorite. Noodle spun around in the mirror then opened the changing room door to show Murdoc. "Do you like it?" Noodle asked with a huge grin on her face. Murdoc looked up from the magazine that he was reading and looked at Noodle. "Yeah, love, it looks good on you." Then adding, "Is that the last one?" Noodle rolled her menacing emerald eyes, "No, Murdoc-san that was only the first!" Noodle laughed and returned to her dressing room. Outside the somewhat bitter Murdoc rolled his eyes and sighed to himself, "It's going to be a long day." Noodle spent another good hour in that store trying on shirt after shirt, and jeans after jeans. She didn't get tired of it, but she couldn't say the same for Murdoc, and they still had way more stores to go! After trying on all the clothes she picked out, she decided what she wanted (Which consisted of mostly everything) and led Murdoc up to the sales counter to pay for everything. The clerk rang up one item after another gawking at how much the duo was spending. When she tried to tell Murdoc the price of all the items he stopped her and just handed her his card. He did not want to know. More or less Noodle was going to get everything no matter the price. The clerk handed Murdoc the piles of bags, and the then Noodle and Murdoc walked out of the store moving on to the next store that Noodle would see and surely spend hours in like she had before.

2D walked up to the kitchen knowing that's where he would find Russel. He was not excited about having to tell Russel that him and Noodle were in a relationship together, but he was scared about what Russel would do to him when 2D told him he took her virginity as well. It was not going to be good. "Hey, D." Russel acknowledged as 2D gambled into the kitchen. 2D smiled, "Hey Russ." Then adding, "Would you like me to make some coffee?" The drummer nodded and 2D went to work making a pot of coffee. He thought maybe he could soften the blow a little. He added in two scoops of pre-grounded coffee beans, six cups of water, and pushed the 'on' button. He decided that he would wait until the coffee was done and given to Russel before breaking the news. 2D desperately hated to tell him, but as he thought before it was easier to get it done and over with instead of waiting and letting Russel find out for himself. Ding. The coffee pot made the noise that signaled that the coffee was all done brewing. 2D poured the scorching hot coffee into two coffee mugs and placed one in front of Russel and put one across from where Russel was sitting for himself. "Mmm, this is good, 2D, thank you." 2D nodded and made small talk, "So what's new? Any new ladies in your life Russ?" Russel rolled his eyes knowing that 2D was making small talk for some reason, "Well nothing much new. I think you would know 2D. Just making some new beats for future songs, and working on mixing some music, and no there is no ladies in my life, D."

Then rolling his eyes, "What about you?" Russel was curious as to what 2D was going to say. 2D knew he had to play this all out smoothly, he could tell that Russel knew something was going on. "Well nothing much just the usual. Oh and I broke up with Melissa. Her and Me weren't really working out. I thought there was something there between us, but it turns out there wasn't and she was cheating on me the whole time we were dating." Russel blurted out, "Harsh man I'm sorry!" 2D shrugged his shoulders, "Well if she needed to cheat on me then she wasn't worth my time anyway. It's all-good. And actually Russ there is a new lady in my life and well she is amazing." 2D's hands were sweating, and he felt clammy, "Ok, here it goes," He thought, "No holding back now." Russel's eyebrows rose, "Oh really? Is that why you were only making small talk with me Stuart Pot?" Russel laughed not knowing what he would hear next, "So who is the lucky lady?" 2D breathed in a deep breath, "Actually Russ it is Noodle." Russel looked up from the newspaper. His eyes were alert and staring straight at 2D. 2D could tell that deep beneath Russel's skin his blood was boiling to a temperature that was un-healthy. "What?" Russel managed to get out between clenched teeth. 2D continued more afraid of what would happen if he didn't, "Noodle and I are a couple now. I love her more than any other girl that I have ever dated and she loves me just the same. Before you say anything, I know that I just said that about Melissa a few days ago, but that was different she didn't return those feelings and that love was just a fantasy. I really care about Noodle." Russel un-clenched his teeth just a little, and spoke in a more welcoming tone, "2D I can't believe you. I know that I told her that she liked you, but I was never planning on letting it go like this between you! What happens if it doesn't work out and you break up with her? Or she breaks up with you. What will happen to this band? I'm glad to hear that you really care about her, but I just don't want her hurt she is my baby girl." 2D nodded, "I understand Russel. I have no clue what would happen to this band, but I have no intention of hurting her, and me telling her now that we can't be together would hurt her also." Russel pondered 2D's statement for a moment then agreed, "Your right 2D, it would hurt her, and I guess what I am saying is I approve. Go ahead."

2D breathed in a breath of relief. "Thank you Russel I was hoping this would go well, and that you wouldn't kill me!" Russel laughed, "Now is there anything else that I should know about while we are both here?" 2D sighed again, "Yes Russel there is. Last night after we went to the beach Noodle told me that she was ready, and that she wanted to give it up to me. So last night well we did it. I am sorry Russel if that is not what you wanted. Again Russel's face flared up then calmed, "Stu-pot I don't know what I am going to do with you. But if she comes crying to me and tells me something different then you are going to be in trouble." 2D shook off all his nerves and replied, "Agreed." Russel gave 2D a friendly pat on the back then walked down to the studio. And 2D thought to himself, "Dang, that went a whole lot better than I thought!" And finished off his strong tasting coffee.

Meanwhile Murdoc was still being drug around the mall by a never tiring Noodle. Going to store after store. Murdoc even had to go back and forth to the Jeep to pile in all the bags because there was an immense amount of them. Just when he thought that they were done Noodle found an underwear, and bra store. Noodle spent an hour in the store trying all different styles, sizes, and colors of bras on, and she picked out a whole new underwear wardrobe which Murdoc saw. She was looking pretty good to him. Noodle gathered all her items, paid for them, and then made Murdoc run out to put all the bags in the Jeep again. She had one more stop to make. She wanted to go to the furniture store there to see what she could do about her room. She wanted new bedding, curtains, décor, and whatever else her crystal eyes saw. She went ahead without Murdoc figuring that he would just slow her down. Luckily for her the store had everything she needed to transform her room. She hadn't gotten any new bedding since a couple years ago and now that she had the chance she was taking it. She looked all around the store until she found what she was looking for. It was a black and white bed set that had matching curtains and also had optional decoration options available. She loved it! The comforter was mostly white and had big black flowers stitched

Into it. There was two pillows that each had a black flower in the corner and another pillow that had a black chandelier stitched onto it. The bed sham was just black and the sheets were white. The curtains were sheer see through white that would just let the sun peek through in the mornings. Along with all that Noodle also got some white rugs, and some wall art of a chandelier to match. Her new room was going to look perfect! As of today she was a new person! And now she had the clothes and new room to prove it.

As she was gathering all the necessities for her bedroom Murdoc showed up just in time so he could pay for it all. He really spent so much money on her today! Very unusual for Murdoc. For the ten-billionth time that day Murdoc handed the clerk his card and they were on their way. This time for good. They gathered the sacks with Noodle's new room in them and carried them to the Jeep. Murdoc made sure she had all the heavy bags so it took them a little longer. Noodle couldn't believe how heavy they were. It was like carrying one of Russel on each of your shoulders. "Murdoc," Noodle huffed, "Can you please take some of these heavier bags, they are killing me!" Murdoc looked back at Noodle and 'just noticed' that he had given her all the heavy bags. "Yeah, here sorry Noods I forgot you can't carry as much as I can." Noodle coped to smile and followed behind Murdoc for the rest of the walk to the Jeep. Five minutes later they arrived at the Jeep and shoved the remainder of the bags in the trunk. Noodle climbed around to the passenger side then hugged Murdoc, "Thank you Murdoc-san! No one else would have dared taking me to the mall." Murdoc laughed because he could see why everyone repented from taking Noodle to the mall, " Your welcome Noods. I'm glad _you_ had fun." Murdoc turned into the buzzing freeway and they were on their way back to Kong again.

A voice piped up over the noise of the freeway. "Oh Murdoc, I love this song! Please turn it up!" Murdoc turned up the radio that the song Noodle 'loved' was Hellogoodbye's _Here in your arms._ It was a good song, but it wasn't Murdoc's thing. He mostly liked rock. Noodle began singing along with the song.

"_You are the one the one that lies close to me!"_ Noodle blurted aloud.

"_Whispers hello I miss you quite terribly,"_ Noodle sang out again. Murdoc rolled his eyes and sighed, "Only five more minutes until we get home." The song ended just as they were pulling into the car park. Noodle got out of the Jeep and said, "Just in time Murdoc huh?" She giggled and grabbed some of the many bags to take them up to her room. Murdoc thought about helping her, but decided against it when he thought of going into his Winnebago, getting a beer, watching TV and smoking. "Yeah, that sounds better," Murdoc, said agreeing with himself.

"Only six more bags to go!" Noodle sang out as she ran down the hallway past Russel and down to the car park hopefully for the very last time. "Only six more to go?" Russel thought questioning what she meant by that statement. He decided to go see for him self in Noodle's room. See what was the question; her whole floor was nearly covered with shopping bags. He rolled his round eyes and walked out, he didn't even want to know what she bought if she had to have that many bags. Thump. Just as Russel walked out into the hallway Noodle was coming the opposite direction and ran into him then hitting the floor covered in all her bags. "Ah Russel help me I'm being buried alive!" She joked. Russel laughed and picked bag after bag off her. There were clearly more than six bags there. "Dang baby girl, what all did you get?" The drummer questioned. Noodle sat up of the floor, "Well," She started but was interrupted by Russel. "Okay well if you have to say well before you tell me than I don't want to know." He laughed. Noodle smiled making her famous puppy dog face, "Can I at least tell you one thing I got Russel-san!" Russel gave in, he always did to that face, "Yeah go ahead." Noodle grinned, "Okay well you know how I haven't changed my room for like two years? Well I got some stuff to change it! It is really cute Russel-san! Do you think maybe you and 2D can help me put it together later?" Russel had nothing planned for later except the fact that it was already 11 o'clock at night, "Noodle that sounds okay, you will just have to check with 2D. I will need some help and I am pretty sure that Murdoc won't want to do it." Noodle's face brightened, "Russel-san, do you know that Murdoc was the one that bought me everything today! I didn't pay for a thing" Russel was amazed! Murdoc bought her all this stuff? He hardly ever even wants to buy groceries.

"Wow Noodle count yourself lucky because this will probably never happen again" Russel said then remembering what he was going to tell Noodle when she got home, "So 2D came and talked to me today." Noodle looked at him with her eyes wide open, "Oh really Russel, what did he say?" Russel smiled afraid that he had scared the girl, "Well Noodle, he told me about your relationship and also told me that well you lost your," Russel could not bear to say the word, "V-card," He finally stuttered out. Noodle was in shock, did Russel just say that he knew that he lost her virginity without going into shock! "Um yes Russel I did, and I don't regret it if that's what you're asking. I really love 2D. And I really believe that he loves me too." Russel smiled glad to hear that she didn't regret it; he really didn't want to have to kill 2D. "He does baby girl. He also told me that today." Noodle nodded then went down to 2D's room to ask if he would like to help her and Russel put her room together. Of course he wanted to and the three of them started taking out all of Noodle's old things that she did not want anymore and replacing them with her new stuff. Her room was coming together great and it was looking just how she had pictured it when she was at the store picking out everything. So far they had her bedding done, and the décor all out including the rugs. And they were working on putting up the wall art, the curtains, and fixing her bathroom. They were getting it all done, and were having fun doing it. Re-doing her room was like a total family night for Noodle. Except the fact that Murdoc wasn't there. By the time that Noodle's room got done everyone was so tired and was ready to go to bed. Russel and 2D were most definitely the most tired, and they hardly did anything that day. Russel kissed Noodle good night and went down to his room to turn in. 2D was about to play suite but he smiled and asked, "Noodle, would you like to come sleep in my room tonight?" Noodle loved the idea, but she was so tired and wanted to sleep in her new room so she refused, "No 2D-san, that is okay I will come sleep with you tomorrow night!" 2D nodded and kissed Noodle's forehead then left the room.

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, and a half!" A satisfied Murdoc Niccals counted how many beers he drank so far that night. "Next time I go for twelve!" He grumbled and sank deeper into the lounge chair. He turned on the TV and instantly began laughing. It was the same show that is always on when he is drunk, and the same show that always gets him so worked up to be well Murdoc. "Hmm, I wonder if any of the girls are making house calls tonight?" He thought, but then remembered that night when he saw Noodle and 2D in the act. "I would like some of her." He thought deep inside his intoxicated mind, "Tonight." The bassist got up grinned and began walking to the toilets suspecting Noodle would be there sometime that night. Stumbling he managed to get all the way to the toilets and sat on the counter where the sinks are. Leaning against the cold, hard wall he would wait, until his prey reached the danger zone.

Noodle tossed and turned in her sleep that night wondering if she should have went and stayed with 2D. It would be more comfortable for her. Suddenly a signal went off in her body that to her meant that she had to go to the bathroom. Because of her bathroom being totally blocked by piles of old stuff she would have to walk down the hall to the toilets. "Just what I need," She sighed, " To have the perfect relationship, then one night walk down to the bathroom and get eaten by a zombie!" Noodle laughed rolling her eyes, "Russel should have thought before he piled the mountain of stuff in front of my bathroom!" Noodle got out of bed and started a fast paced walk toward the toilets. Stopping mid way, "Oh shit," She cursed, "I forgot my scythe!" Noodle didn't want to travel all the way back to her bedroom then all the way back to the bathroom so she decided to forget the scythe and move on. One, two, and three. Noodle sprinted towards the entryway to get to the toilets. She didn't like wondering around Kong alone at night, maybe she would go to 2D's room. After all it was closer to the bathroom. She opened the heavy door then slammed it putting her back up against it afraid that someone would try to break in after her. Then she stopped in her tracks. She could hear someone breathing. She could feel the tiny hairs on the back of her neck rise. She felt around for the light switch. "Damn where is it!" She mumbled to herself. The breathing lessened. Noodle took a deep breath in and ran towards one of the stalls only to be caught by two big, strong hands. "It's okay, love, I'm not going to hurt you!" Noodle's eyes widened in terror. Only two people called her love, and that was 2D and Murdoc. But 2D's sweet voice wasn't present, so that means it was. "Murdoc?" Noodle yelled.

" Yes Noods, its me. Don't worry darling just leave this all to me and it will be over before you know it. And no one else doesn't even need to know. Hush" Noodle was sickened. How could he do this to her? Murdoc's breath stank of booze and cheap cigarettes. She tried and tried to push him away, to scream, to do anything. But nothing could escape her throat. She just laid there. Watching as he did what he wanted to her without even caring. "Murdoc. Murdoc. Please stop. You don't know what your doing, your drunk!" Noodle sobbed. All Murdoc would even say was, "Hush I'm almost done," or, "Shh, love, you are fine." 30 minutes of torture and she was lying on the bathroom floor, alone, hurt, and crying onto the unbreakable floor tiles that mocked her. How could he do that to her and then just leave her like that? How could he? These thoughts seemed to scream through her thoughts. "No one can ever find out about this. No one. If they did that would cause too many problems, and I am just not ready for that yet. Your okay Noodle your okay." Noodle consoled herself and she limped back to her room. There was no sense to going to sleep in 2D's room. Because once he saw her he would know exactly what happened.

Only the sound of shattering sobs echoed through her room that night. It all felt like a dream, but she could tell that the pain was real. Just like the first time, but the first time she had meant for it to happen. And no emotional pain came from the first time. She had meant it the first time and did it out of love. Unlike this time where it seemed as if she was blind folded and was told to walk across a floor of broken glass without getting cut. "What is going to become of me?" Noodle questioned her self, "What am I going to tell everyone else if, if I'm pregnant?" Noodle nodded, "There will be a time when I will have to tell everyone, but that time is not now. I am strong! He huffed and he puffed, and he blew my house down, but that doesn't mean that I cannot protect what's inside of it."

_I want a lover I don't have to love,_

_I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk._

_Where's the kid with the chemicals?_

_I got a hunger and I can't seem to get full._

_I need some meaning I can memorize._

_The kind I have always seems to slip_

_my mind._

_But you, but you..._

_You write such pretty words,_

_But life's no storybook._

_Love's an excuse to get hurt._

_And to hurt._

_Do you like to hurt?_

_I do, I do._

_Then hurt me,_

_Then hurt me,_

_Then hurt me..._

_**-Bright Eyes: Lover I Don't Have To Love**_

Erika Note: YAY! This is where it gets fun for me! The plot. Well please **read and review**. I want to know how you like it so yea. Lol sorry this took so long to write, it is by far the longest chapter. If you made it through all of it, THANK YOU!


	7. Amy In The White Coat

_You take your clothes off_

_Right after school_

_The tea is on_

_The flame is blue_

_And you hope it won't take_

_All afternoon_

_The TV's waiting_

_To talk to you_

_It's your naked body_

_On white velour_

_But there's no feeling_

_Just weight on you_

_But you get nauseous now_

_As he speaks to you_

_Such proper language_

_For acts so cruel_

_He says "we all follow the rules_

_We can't very well go and break them now can we?_

_For you, for you, for you.._

_**-Bright Eyes: Amy In The White Coat**_

_Dear Diary_

_So much has happened in the __**last weeks**__. I keep throwing up every morning, and I am not sick! Russel has threatened to take me to the doctor several times but I have refused. I know what it is, and I don't need a doctor to confirm it to me. I haven't been eating for the past week trying not to get any bigger. I am already staring to develop a bump. I try and try to make it go away; to get smaller. And is this some kind of punishment? I did not do anything. Murdoc did this to me and yet he walks around with his head held high like he never did anything at all. I don't deserve this. As for Kong, and the rest of the band; everything is normal. I am still with 2D, Russel still eats a lot, and Murdoc is still Murdoc. And me, well I am pregnant. I am depressed. I don't know what to do with this kid. How could he do this to me? I want to die._

_XOXO, Noodle._

Noodle set her diary, and pen away in her usual hiding spot, and sprinted to the toilets. "Mmmblek," Noodle threw up for the second time this morning. "Oh god," Noodle leaned her back up against the side of the stall and cried, "What am I going to do? No one will want me when they figure out this!" She felt everything rise up into her throat and she threw up again. This was going to kill her. "Noodle? Noodle, love, is that you?" 2D asked shocked that Noodle was throwing up yet again this morning. Noodle answered 2D with another hurl into the toilet, and 2D rushed into the stall and held her soft hair out of her way. 2D noticed that Noodle was throwing up, but nothing was coming up; only stomach acid. 2D had noticed that she hasn't been eating a lot, but he just thought it was some phase. Not only until now did he notice that something was wrong with her. "Okay 2D, I'm done. You can let go of my hair." Noodle sat back in her original position shaking. She could tell that 2D knew something was going on. "2D, I need to tell you something," Noodle started, but abruptly stopped when Russel entered the toilets to see what was going on. Russel glanced at Noodle on the floor. She was pale, shaking harder than a washing machine, and she had a bump. Not an ordinary bump but it looked like a baby bump! Russel took in his surroundings, "Family conference in the studio." Then adding, "Now!" The tone of Russel's voice told Noodle to get into that studio even if she was going to be throwing up the whole way there.

Noodle's stomach tossed and turned with every step to the studio. She knew that she would have to tell everyone even if she didn't want to. Russel would make her. How was she supposed to tell all of them that it was Murdoc that did this to her? Of course Murdoc already knew, but breaking the new to Russel and 2D was going to be the hardest. What if 2D didn't want her anymore and Russel disowned her? That would be the worst imaginable. Only a few more steps until she reached her trap. "Why should I be worried?" Noodle thought, "Like I said I didn't even do anything!" Noodle paused in the hallway before walking into the studio where the three men already arrived. Noodle was shaking. It shouldn't be this hard just to come out and say it. "Sit down Noodle," Russel asked her. "Hai." Noodle replied and sat in a chair that Russel had purposely put in front of everyone. She felt like the spotlight was on her. That somewhere beneath the rotting ceiling Russel had planted a spot light just for a moment like this. Noodle gazed at the three men. There was clearly a lot on tension in the room. Noodle could feel it gravitating around them in a circle. "Well," Russel said impatiently, "What is going on, Noodle?" Noodle focused her eyes on 2D, and gave him a sympathetic look. "I, I'm." Noodle started but was stopped when a waterfall of tears streamed down her face. She couldn't stop the tears from coming out. It was like a dam broke behind her eyes, and the contractors couldn't repair the crack. Russel lent out his hand to the cheerless, weeping Noodle, "There, there baby girl. Just come out and say what you need to say and we will be all done here." Noodle nodded and tried to sniff back all of her tears. "Russel I'm." Noodle began the sobbing again, "Oh Russel, I'm pregnant."

"Excuse me Noodle what did you say? It sounded like you said I'm pregnant, but I want to be sure because I would hate to kill 2D over nothing." Russel said with baring clenched teeth. Noodle looked up at the drummers face, "Yes Russel, I said that I am pregnant, and I know that is true. I am getting bigger everyday, and I'm hardly eating at all. Also, I throw up every morning due to morning sickness." Noodle was trembling. There was a long pause between all four members. No one wanted to talk right now, and have a chance of getting yelled at by Russel. They could all see that Russel was upset. He was trying to hold back his tears, and anger the best that he could. The drummer silently got up without a word. "How the hell did you get pregnant?" Russel screamed at Noodle, and threw a potted plant sailing across the room and braking against the wall. There was silence. Russel continued in his rage, "2D, oh 2D. Man you have a ten second start." Russel yelled at the singer, "ten, nine, eight." 2D didn't move from his position on the couch. Russel continued, "Seven, six, five, four." Still 2D hadn't moved. Russel got closer to 2D preparing to knock him into the next century when he got to one, "Three, two, and one." Russel raised his huge hand and curled it into a fist, and was so close to brining it down on 2D when Noodle screamed, "Stop!" Noodle pushed out the remainder of her breath and told everyone the truth. "Russel it was not 2D who got me pregnant. It was Murdoc. About a month ago, when we re-did my room, I had to go to the bathroom really bad. And since you had piled all that stuff in front of my bathroom, well I couldn't use it. So I had to walk all the way down to the toilets, and when I got there it was blacker than night. I slipped, and then couldn't find the light switch, so I just darted into the toilets, but before I got there Murdoc got me." Noodle's lungs gasped for more air, " So Russel, Murdoc is the one who did this to me not 2D."

Russel moved his hand away from 2D. He was in shock that he was actually going to hit him. Not just because he wasn't the one who did it, but also because he would usually never think of hitting one of his band mates ever. "Murdoc?" The drummer questioned, "Why did you do this? Why did you do this to her? What were you thinking." Russel said with control, but letting himself loose as the questions went on. Murdoc who was sitting lazily on the couch the whole time acting as if he didn't care replied, "Well for one Russ I was madly drunk. And I guess I just did it to her because she is the only living creature here that I could ever consider doing it to. But like I said mate I was drunk." Russel rolled his white eyes and his face was growing redder, " Murdoc, that gives you no reason to do this to her! I can't believe you sunk this low. Didn't you know that her and 2D were dating; you probably screwed it all up now!" Murdoc rolled his eyes, " Why should I care? Huh Russ. It is their relationship let those two figure it out for themselves." Then adding, "If Noodle is pregnant than that is her problem, not mine." Murdoc got up, turned on his heel and left the area; most likely to his Winnebago. Noodle was looking around the studio with wide eyes. "What is going to happen?" She thought, "I do not want to have an abortion. That would be wrong and against my beliefs. Will they make me?" Noodle shook away her thoughts and ran to her room; where she always felt the most comfort. She didn't even care to know if anyone would follow. She didn't need anyone. She was already going to have a baby! What worse could happen right? Noodle laid quietly on her bed sobbing. She couldn't believe what was happening to her. There she thought she just had the perfect life, and it only took about ten minutes to ruin it.

Noodle heard a sound on her door. Someone was knocking; were they going to come in and comfort her, or were they going to tell her to shut up. "Noods, Noods its just us, Russel and 2D. Can we come in and talk to you?" Noodle wasn't sure of what her answer would be. She really did want to talk to them, but she didn't want to hear that she couldn't keep the baby, or they were kicking her out. Noodle sighed, "Sure you can both come in." 2D and Russel entered the room quietly and sat on either side of Noodle. 2D pulled Noodle up close to him in his lap and stroked her fine hair, "I love you, Noods." He smiled, "No matter what happens." Noodle smiled and looked up hopefully at him with her emerald eyes. She felt like part of her heart had been mended, but the other part was still broken. "Thank you," Noodle whispered. Russel smiled at the sight. He was sure that 2D would take her back, and now he was filled with joy that he was right. "Noodle, me and 2D were talking, and just to make sure that you are pregnant and it's not something else; we are going to take you to the doctors." Noodle nodded she knew that she would have to go to the doctor. She could always expect that from Russel. "Okay Russel-san, but can you and 2D stay there with me. I don't want to be alone." Noodle asked. Russel laughed jokingly, "Of course. Didn't you catch that _we_ were taking you?" Then adding, "Well come on then lets go get into the car." Noodle gawked, "We are going _now_? I just told you guys about it. Can't I have a rest please?" Russel thought about it, but this was a serious thing that Noodle was going to go through, "No Noods, we have to go now. You can rest later." Noodle rolled her eyes, "Fine we will go now. You get what you want, Russel-san." She huffed out her words then started heading towards the car park so she could get this over and come back to Kong to rest.

"That a girl." Russel smiled and helped Noodle out of the car when they had arrived at the doctor's office. Noodle refused his hand, and got out of the car herself. And just to prove it to Russel she curtsied. Noodle smiled menacingly and skipped to the doors, while Russel and 2D tagged behind her. "Russel?" 2D asked. Russel looked to his left at 2D, "What, D?" 2D turned his full attention to Russel, "Well have you noticed that Noodle seems a bit different lately?" Russel laughed, "Of course, 2D, but it is because she is pregnant." 2D nodded. If only Russel had knew what 2D knew. Well because it was 2D who had noticed Noodle getting a more suicidal trait in her body just recently. But maybe Russel was right, and it was only because she was pregnant. The two men caught up with Noodle when she was signing herself in. Russel smiled at her, "Just like a little lady!" Noodle abruptly turned around on her toe, "What did you call me, Russel?" Russel was taking aback, "I said little lady is that okay?" Noodle relaxed her shoulders and smiled up at the giant, "Oh yeah it is sorry Russel I'm just a little nervous." She turned her head back to the receptionist she was talking to, "Yeah I am here to see Dr. Tsuchida." The overworked receptionist nodded her head and motioned Noodle to go sit in the waiting room, and to wait until a nurse came out of the office and called her name. "Jeez, it seems like everyone is going to the doctor today." Noodle whispered at Russel while she was trying to find a seat. There were only three options available to her. One was sitting next to a guy with about 50 or more tattoos, a lip ring, a septum piercing, and only about five eyebrow rings. Another option was sitting next to an old lady who looked about sixty. There was nothing wrong with that except that she was giving Noodle a evil glare. The last option was the best. Noodle went and sat down next to a mother who had two little girls. She was probably taking them in for a physical.

The mother of the two girls was reading a parenting magazine while the older of the two girls played with her dolls, and the other sat tugging on her mother's leg. When Noodle sat down next to her the mother looked up from her magazine, "How far along are you?" She asked concerned. Noodle looked up from her hand in her lap, "Excuse me?" The mother let out a comforting laugh, "Oh I'm sorry if I startled you! I was just wondering about how far along you were with your baby." Noodle was shocked; how did she know that Noodle was pregnant? Noodle shot a bashful smile at the lady, " Well I actually don't know if I am pregnant yet. That's why I am here today to find out." The mother smiled and took a hold of Noodle's hand, "Oh hunny I can tell you are pregnant! I've already had two wonderful girls myself." Noodle nodded letting her eyes once again gaze towards the floor. The woman saw that Noodle was unhappy, "Oh hunny. I'm so sorry; that's not what you wanted to hear was it? Was this planned?" The mother questioned then adding, "It is none of my business, but if there is anything that I can do to help let me know!" Noodle looked back up to the lady. Why was she being so nice to Noodle? When everybody else saw that she was pregnant they all gave her dirty looks. "Well actually Miss, I didn't plan this to happen. It wasn't even with my boyfriend; you could say it was against my will." Noodle shot her a thankful look, "But yes I'm afraid that there is some stuff I would like to ask you and talk to you about. I know nothing about taking care of kids, and so far I plan to keep my baby. I couldn't stand myself if I just gave it away." The mother smiled, "Okay well I will be glad to help you! My name is Diana, and this is my oldest daughter Kinsey; she is five, and my youngest daughter Berlin; she is three. Sweetie, what is yours?" Noodle giggled, "Oh I'm sorry! My name is Noodle! Nice to meet you!"

"Well Noodle, here is my number," Diana said handing Noodle a piece of paper with her number written neatly on it, "Call me anytime you need to talk or anytime you need anything! Again this is none of my business, but do you live with your mother or father?" Noodle accepted the card that was handed to her and shook her head, "No, I don't. My past is well a little twisted. But for now, and probably for a long while I live with Russel, 2D, and Murdoc." Noodle sucked in a breath then continued, "They are really the only three people that could take care of me. Russel is defiantly like a father figure, and 2D is the man I am dating. Murdoc, well he is the one who got me pregnant. The reason I live with them is because we are in the band Gorillaz." Noodle laughed, "Sorry it was such a long, complicated story." Diana nodded, "It is totally okay Noodle. Everybody has his or her stories! Well I am a single mom; the dad left right after Berlin was born." Diana sighed, "If it wasn't for me working as a Doctor I wouldn't have enough money to support my kids!" Noodle reached out of her comfort zone and hugged Diana, "Oh Diana, I am so sorry! That makes my story seem like nothing!" Diana interrupted her with a smile, "No, no Noodle it is quite alright. We have everything we need a good home, food, and the girls have everything they have always wanted! We are doing just fine!" Noodle released her tight hug on Diana, "Okay. I guess it's just that I really don't have anyone to talk to. I mean probably the best one to talk to would be Russel, but he still treats me like I'm 12! He never really knows what to say to me! Especially at girl problems! Oh how I wish I had a mom! Then I could have someone to really talk to about all my problems!"

"Noodle," A blonde haired nurse called from the door signaling it was time for Noodle's appointment. Diana smiled at her and pulled her in to one last hug, "Ok darling, well you have my number, and you can call me for anything! I will be your mom if you allow me to. I know we just met but I really like you! Please call me later to tell me how your appointment went!" Noodle broke away from the hug with tears in her eyes, "Ok Diana! Thank you so much!" Then she got up and joined Russel, and 2D who were already at the door to go into the office wondering who Noodle was talking to and hugging. "Who was that Noodle?" Russel questioned. Noodle rolled her eyes, and gave Russel a hug, "You don't have to worry Russel it was just a friend." Russel shook his head, "Okay well let's go get this over with." Noodle got weighed, and her height measured by the nurse then was lead into an exam room. The room was very uncomfortable. She had to sit on this bench like bed that dug deeply into her but. The walls were panted an off-white shade and the wall behind her had a huge mirror on it. Russel and 2D were sitting on the opposite side of the room on chairs that were basically wood and fabric. Soon there was a light knock on the door, and a petite Japanese woman wearing a Doctor's coat walked in. She was young for a doctor, probably only in her early thirties. She had short, dark hair that was shorter in the back and got gradually longer in the front. Her hair was also layered, and sported side bangs.

"Good afternoon Noodle I'm Dr. Tsuchida." A sweet, simple voice stated. "I understand that you are here today for a pregnancy test, and to discuss your options?" Noodle nodded looking at 2D rather than the doctor, "Yeah, that would be right." The doctor wrote something down on her clipboard, "Okay than Noodle, what I need you to do is go into the bathroom and pee on this, and when you are done stick it in the turning cabinet. The test will determine if you are pregnant." Noodle grabbed the stick from Dr. Tsuchida and headed down the hall to the bathroom. Noodle did what she had to then returned to the depressing room to sit, and wait with 2D and Russel for the results. Russel was the first to speak up, "Well Noodle I am pretty sure that you are pregnant, but I thought it was a good idea just to make sure." Noodle nodded, and 2D seconded Russel's thought. Russel gazed his eyes on Noodle, "If you decide to keep the baby then you will have to know that _you_ will have to take care of it. The baby will be your responsibility only, and 2D, Murdoc, or myself will not be taking care of it. It will be really hard Noodle, but I know if you want to keep it badly enough that you will provide for your baby. Noodle acknowledged him with a nod of her head, and then Dr. Tsuchida walked through the door with her results.

The tension hung in the air. Everyone's stomachs were doing back flips, and cartwheels. The doctor let out a sigh, "Well Noodle it looks like you are pregnant. Would you like to know the gender of your baby?" Noodle looked up into the extravagant blue eyes of the Doctor, "Um yes, I would." Dr. Tsuchida nodded, "Well congratulations it is a girl!" Noodle's face lit up. She wanted a girl. She cradled her stomach gently whispering to it that she loves her baby. Everyone could see that Noodle was excited about the results. Dr. Tsuchida was the first to call her out, "If you are planning to keep this baby then you will have to eat the right kinds of food. Also, you cannot drink nor smoke. I want you to be sure that you are going to be ready for all of the responsibility that a baby bring you." Noodle interrupted her, "Its okay we have this all figured out. You don't need to tell me what and what not I have to do, okay?" The doctor nodded, "Okay then, we will schedule you another appointment in a few months, good luck." Noodle was so glad that she could finally get off that bench. She gave Russel, and 2D a big hug; then ran out into the waiting room to see if Diana was still there. Noodle looked all over the office for her, but there was no Diana. "Russel, 2D-san can you go make my next appointment for me?" Noodle asked so she could call Diana and tell her the news. Russel nodded, "Sure baby girl." Noodle didn't want Russel or 2D listening over her conversation so she walked outside the building and call Diana on her cell phone. "Hello? Diana this is Noodle; I just got done with my appointment. There was an excited voice on the other line, "Oh hey Noodle. Tell me all about it." Noodle sighed, "Well like you said I am pregnant, with a girl too. The problem is I'm not happy. I never wanted this to happen and now everyone is making it seeming like the only thing I will ever get to do anymore is care for this baby. Diana, I am just aching all over I just feel like this isn't what it was supposed to be." Diana answered her in a comforting, motherly voice, "Noodle it will be okay. I know this is not what you ever had in mind, but you can get through this. I will help you okay? Please just don't do anything to hurt yourself! Listen hunny, Berlin is crying at me and I need to go for now. I will call you later okay?" Then adding, "Bye Noodle, I love you." Noodle was amazed did someone actually say that to her? It felt so good! "I love you too Diana, bye." Noodle started to smile, but stopped midway. This wasn't going to fix anything that had been done to her. Noodle jumped into the warm Jeep that sat beckoning her, and felt a pain of desire to hurt herself. Just to relieve the pain that scarred beneath her fragile skin.

_But I saw you walking once_

_Under powder blue skies_

_You looked cold still, your collar was high_

_And I tried to talk to you_

_But you walked right by_

_I don't know which I said then_

"_Hello" or "Goodbye"_

_See we're all trying to be pure_

_But it isn't a very easy thing, now is it_

_To do, to do, to do, to do, to do, to do_

_Isn't it, isn't it, isn't it, isn't it_

_Isn't it, isn't it, isn't it, isn't it?_

_**-Bright Eyes: Amy In The White Coat**_

Erika note: Okay so chapter seven! It is all going to go downhill for Noodle after this. This was another long chapter. Oh, and I own Diana, Kinsey, Dr. Tsuchida, and Berlin, they are my own characters. OKAY, and I know that is not how you find out the gender of your baby, but I wanted to save you some time, and me some typing. Please **read and review**.

Thanks to: Swizzers, The Dum Dum, Ahliorsh, Gorillazluvr, and Celena for Reviewing!!! THANKS SO MUCH! You guys are the reason I CONTINUE MY STORY! Please tell your friends!!!


	8. Sober

_I don't wanna be the girl who laughs the loudest_

_Or the girl who never wants to be alone_

_I don't wanna be that call at four o'clock in the morning_

_'cuz i'm the only one you know in the world that won't be home_

_The sun is blinding_

_I stayed again_

_Ooh, i am finding_

_That's not the way i want my story to end_

_I'm safe_

_Up high_

_Nothing can touch me_

_Why do i feel this party's over?_

_No pain_

_Inside_

_You're my protection_

_How do i feel this good sober?_

_**-Pink: Sober**_

Dear Diary,

Another few weeks has gone by. Everyday Russel promised me that things would get better, but they haven't. They have actually gotten worse. Yes, I'm eating and I am at a normal weight. I have been acting good in front on everyone, and doing whatever I'm supposed to, but they can't see inside my sleeves. I'm bad. Not only for myself, but also for everyone else to. I saw that in a dream the other night. I was in the studio kitchen holding a sharp, jagged knife to my wrist. Then 2D, Murdoc, and Russel came in and watched me painfully kill myself. Pretty intense dream, huh? I don't even know where all these thoughts I have been having come from. Before all this mess I was just Noodle. Now I'm 'Noodle with a past'. Oh Diary that sounds so pathetic. I know that I do have it a lot better than most people, but this is truly horrible for me. Most days I even think that it would be better if I were dead. Then Murdoc would be happy, and 2D would be happy that he didn't have to take care of the baby or me. Usually when I feel the trickling of my own blood down my arm; it calms me. But recently I've had to cut more and more. Also deeper to get the same feeling of relief that I had before. And of course none of the boys know yet. And they never will, believe me. There are only a few more months left until I have this baby, and I have to try to make the best of it.

XOXO, Noodle

Noodle shut her purple diary, and flopped back down on her bed. "Why is this so damn hard?" She screamed at herself. 2D was still trying to convince her that he wants to be with her and take care of the baby. He told her that he could do it, and that he wants to. She refused him many times saying that she doesn't need help, but thanks anyway. She did still love him, but there was something inside of her that was telling her not to get close to anyone anymore because all they will do is screw you over. Noodle thought that her own problems were all she could handle right now. Something caught her eye. Silver blade met with the shining of the light. The reflection on the blade hit Noodle's face and gave her the 'go ahead' sign. She reached a small hand out to the predator. It felt so good against her skin. "Only once." Noodle promised herself and introduced her pulsing wrist to the knife. Not feeling satisfied with the first prick she pushed it in deeper letting the red waters run down her arm, and onto her bed. Noodle laughed, "What a wimpy cut! I can do much better!" Again she dug the revolting knife in then under her skin. Noodle was still unsatisfied. Lying to herself she announced, "That is still so wimpy Noodle. If the boys saw that cut all they would say is 'Silly girl that's the best you can do?'." For the last time she dug it in so deep and ran the knife most the way up her fragile arm. About to take the knife out Noodle was relieved at last. "Feels so good!" Noodle said aloud, "Maybe just one," Russel smacked open the door to see the sight that he thought he would never have to see in his lifetime. Noodle was sitting on her bloody bed with one arm extended, and the other holding a knife to it. There were cuts clear up her arms, and each one got deeper and deeper. She had blood on part of her face, and chin and he eyes were lazy; drooping back into her head. She was completely unaware of Russel standing in the room, she just kept along with her business an ignored him.

Finally a dull roar was able to escape Russel's closed throat, "Noodle." He said weakly then turned his fear into hate, "Noodle, what the hell are you doing? I trust you with so much and this is how you repay me? You little," 2D and Murdoc heard all the commotion from the kitchen and ran towards Noodle's room. When they both arrived in a matter of seconds short of breath; they same the same sight that Russel saw. Only in this picture Russel stood yelling over Noodle. "Noodle, I swear I can't believe you have sunk this low. I don't even know who you are anymore; if I could have my way right now your ass would be out of this damn house!" Noodle got up to her feet and dropped the knife, "Fine Russel. You get your way just like always. I will be glad to leave I hate it here and these past months all of you have made my life a living hell!" She paused crying and clutching her bleeding arm, "I have wanted to say this for so long Russel. To you and to everyone. I want to die! So kick me out of this house I will just go somewhere else. I can survive without you! And when I have this baby I will make sure to bring it right back to Kong, so maybe it will grow up to be just like me someday and Murdoc can get it pregnant! Noodle finished screaming and everyone besides her was speechless. She took two more seconds to look at them then starting rummaging threw all of her things to grab what she needed to live off of. "I hate you, I hate you, and I hate you!" Noodle screeched as she fell to the floor and grabbed her stomach, " This 'thing' is living inside me, and it is the only thing that I can consider to 'like' right now. I don't care what happens to the rest of you!" Russel bent down and picked up Noodle. He was really upset, but not so much at her. He had expected this from her, not the cutting, but the screaming, "Baby girl I didn't mean what I said earlier. I love you and I want you to stay so will you." 2D glanced at Murdoc was this seriously all that it was going to take to make her stop? Noodle rolled her eyes, "And why should I Russel? It never seemed like you guys really cared for me anyway." Russel tried to pull Noodle into a fast hug, but failed, "Noodle, you know that is not true! Deep down you know that we all care for you have your best interest. But I guess if your best interest is to give up, and leave us well I just want to let you know that it won't be easy. You will probably end up working two jobs while supporting your child. Or maybe you will just sell yourself out to guys' every night for a quick buck or two. Whatever the case may be Noodle we love you. 2D really cares about you, and I know that Murdoc will always want to make sure that you are okay no matter what happens. So please baby girl I'm begging you, from the bottom of my heart please stay! And we can all help you get around all this! Please?"

Noodle was crying. They all really did care about her, and she noticed how selfish she was for thinking differently. And how ignorant she was for harming herself, but she was still right. She had to leave. She would let them all win for now, but when they least expected it she would leave, leave from this disaster. She hugged Russel, "Okay Russel I will stay. Thank you for showing me that you really care. Thanks to all of you!" Noodle played with their heads trying to fool them. Russel was relieved; she was going to stay! "Baby girl I can honestly tell you that you made the right choice! And when that baby comes we are all going to be here to help you out!" Russel just then noticing her arms added, "2D, would you go help Noodle wash and bandage her arms please?" 2D nodded and picked Noodle up 'bridal style' and carried her off to her bathroom. He kicked the wooden door open and sat Noodle down on her bathroom counter. He reached for the last drawer on the left and pulled out her first aid kit knowing that it would have exactly what he needed. 2D grabbed Noodle's arm and held it under the cold faucet water; it wasn't working. None of the dried blood was coming off her skin, and he didn't want to hurt her more by scrubbing too hard. "You're getting in the bath." 2D announced to Noodle and picked up off the counter and lowered her down into the waterless bathtub. Then helping her remove her clothes; nothing he hadn't seen before. He got her shirt, bra, and tank top off easy without trouble but when it came to her pants he was struggling; she would not let him do it. "2D! Stop! I don't want to!" Noodle struggled to say as her pants came unbuttoned and slid down past her ankles along with her pink underwear. 2D turned on the bathtub water and let the hot water flow all around Noodle. The water rippled over her leg; exposing a few more deep cuts that the boys failed to see.

"I haven't seen those before!" 2D thought, "God, I really love her. I want to take care of her and her baby, but I don't know if I am capable. I am not the father, and lately it seems like she doesn't want to be around me anymore. Then she started cutting herself. It was obvious when she first started it because she was always wearing sweatshirts, and always tugging her sleeves down over her wrists. I was the first to notice; and when I told Murdoc he told me just to leave it be that she would eventually stop herself. Yeah when? It seems like it is only getting worse for Noodle. She has been eating in front of us, but I am sure that he is throwing it up; again Murdoc said to just ignore it. So maybe that's what I have to do for now." The bathtub was filled up to its maximum capacity, so 2D turned off the water, and told Noodle to wash her hair. "But." Noodle said, "If I get soap in my cuts then they will sing, and really hurt!" 2D just remembered the cuts on her leg, "Noods, why are those cuts on your leg?" Noodle looked away, "Well I was in so much pain and I thought that if I cut on my leg that it would be less obvious." Noodle finished and turned to look at 2D. She could see that he was really hurt by her actions the last couple of days. "I am so sorry 2D-san it is just that I have nothing else to do! Or at least it seems that way for me! It's like I have no other alternative." 2D's eyes grew wet; he was crying. Not crying because he was mad, or feeling sorry for himself, but because he felt sorry for Noodle. She had to go through so much, and he could have been a little more understanding.

"Noods, just remember what ever happens in the future; remember that I love you." 2D said and helped Noodle out of the bathtub so she could dry off, and he could bandage her arms. Noodle grabbed the towel that was offered to her and started drying off her weak body; stopping at her belly. It was getting really big. "Thanks 2D. You know there is going to be a major change soon." Noodle told him, but she wasn't talking about the baby. 2D was clueless of course he didn't know anything about her plan, "I know Noodle, and a baby is going to be a big change around here. But you can do it; we can do it! If you let me!" Noodle winced from the rubbing alcohol being applied to her cuts, and decided she would say what 2D wanted to hear for one last night, "Yes 2D. I would love it if you helped parent my baby!" She faked a smile, and gave him a light peck on the lips. Anything to make it believable. "How about you sleep with me tonight, Noodle?" 2D asked hoping that she would say yes, "Your bed isn't clean yet and I rather that you didn't sleep alone for awhile." Noodle knew that she would have to sleep with him tonight, but that would ruin her plan! Somehow she would figure a way to get out of his room, so she could put her plan into action.

"Of course 2D! I miss sleeping with you!" Noodle smiled and walked back out into her room to put on some clean pajamas. 2D followed her out the bathroom door to make sure that was the only think that she was doing. "2D, what do you think about these ones?" Noodle exclaimed and held up a light pink, long sleeved nightshirt, and matching white pajama pants with pink polka dots. 2D eyed the pajamas; he liked the long sleeves, and long pants so he couldn't see her cuts. "Good choice, love, I sure it will look great on you." Noodle smiled; she was going to hate doing this to not only 2D, but also the rest of the band. She truly believed that they were all good at heart! She pulled on the pajama set, and climbed onto 2D's back for a piggyback ride down to his room, but she made sure that he took the stairs. She still remembered the promise she made to herself a while back about using the elevator again. She hated making him carry her down all those stairs, but it seemed like he didn't care that much. 2D swung open his door then sat Noodle down in one of his lounge chairs while he changed the sheets on his bed. Just watching all of this made Noodle feel worse. She definitely was beginning to think that she didn't deserve this great of a guy. He was so nice, and kind to her! I mean taking care of another mans baby! And lately, the only thing that she has done is treat him like crap! "Alright love, all done! Are you ready to go to sleep?" Noodle really wasn't but she figured the sooner she got to bed, the sooner 2D would fall asleep, and then she could successfully perform her plan.

That night 2D didn't fall asleep so fast. He was up half the night holding Noodle, and gently whispering to her, and the baby in her 'sleep', that everything would be ok. The only problem was that she wasn't really sleeping. "I guess I am a better actress than I thought!" Noodle thought, "Well I guess acting to be asleep isn't that hard!" Noodle didn't hear and more noise, and 2D's grip on her loosened. She fluttered her eyes open to see if he was asleep yet. He was; perfect. His eyes were all the way closed, and his mouth hung open slightly, otherwise known as the 2D sleeping face. That is how Noodle could always tell if he was sleeping or not. "So my plan is going to work tonight." Noodle whispered to herself. Noodle bent down to kiss 2D's tender forehead one last time then she gently rolled out of all the covers and laid belly-down on the floor. She slid on her stomach nearly to the door where she found her bag that she had placed there hours earlier. Noodle checked to make sure everything was in it; money, clothes, cell phone, toiletries, knife, baby book/ guide, license, debit card, and a locket that 2D had given her some years ago. Everything was still there, and it still would have been there even if she hadn't checked because if one of the boys looked through it they would have caught her. She reached up to where she had placed the hanger in the door earlier. She did this because the door wouldn't close all the way, and she wouldn't have to make a big noise when she opened it. Still lying on the floor she pulled herself out to the car park and softly shut 2D's door behind her.

Step one was complete. She was successfully out of 2D's room and where she needed to be for very easy access for her ending. "Yes!" She whispered a little bit to loudly then dropped her bag to the concrete ground that made a harsh thud sound. Slam; Murdoc threw open his Winnebago door and walked over to Noodle, "What the hell are you doing up this late, Noodle?" Noodle backed away; was he going to try to get her pregnant again, "Oh I was just going to the bathroom." The blurted out. Murdoc nodded, and started heading back to the Winnebago, "Okay whatever. I was just making sure that you weren't up to no good." He grumbled a few cuss words then slammed the door again. Noodle sighed and thought, "Oh my gosh! I can't believe he didn't catch me!" Noodle rolled her eyes and took her bag off the floor being extra quite this time. She tiptoed over to the door on the right side of the car park; lucky her that the door was already unlocked, and she didn't have to go find the key. She shut the last door behind her. The last door that she ever was going to shut at Kong. She knew exactly where she was going to go; where she would be welcomed. She took out her cell phone and dialed the monotone seven-digit number. A tired voice picked up on the other line, "No, no I'm fine. I will be there in a few minutes." Noodle assured and hung up the phone. She breathed in, "So this is just the beginning of my journey, it all starts here." For the last time she walked down the steep hill from Kong, and waved goodbye to all she's ever known.

_When it's good, then its good, it's so good_

_Till it goes bad_

_Till you're trying to find the you that you once had_

_I have heard myself crying;_

_Never again_

_Broken down in agony_

_Just tryin' a find a way_

_I'm safe_

_Up high_

_Nothing can touch me_

_Why do i feel this party's over?_

_No pain_

_Inside_

_You're like perfection_

_How do i feel this good sober?_

_Im safe_

_up high_

_nothing can touch me_

_Why do i feel this party's over?_

_no pain_

_inside_

_youre like perfection_

_how go i feel this good sober?_

_**-Pink: Sober**_

Erika Note: Woo-hoo chapter 8! Sorry that it took so long. A few days ago I got REALLY sick (they wanted me in the hospital), and I am still REALLY sick now, but I needed to get this chapter done. So, what I did for 2 nights was type two lines, throw up, type two lines, throw up, type two lines…. You get the idea! But it was really gross because whenever I get sick I get REALLY sick! So you all better appreciate this chapter! Oh and click that little button at the bottom that says **review** and make me sooooo happy!

Thanks to: Swizzers, again for the great support! And Spyder1070, thank you for your first review! I hope for many more =]! Please tell your friends about me THANK YOU!!!

***I will try to get chapter 9 Done soon(ish?) leave me thoughtful reviews!


	9. Unbreakable

A/N: Hey Guys! Just to let you know I am feeling a little bit better! Well my knee gave out on me again so I have to go see yet ANOTHER doctor. I am so happy! Do you know why? Well because I posted the last chapter at like 1a.m and when I woke up the next day (around 10a.m) I had three new reviews! THREE, in less than 10hrs! Ahh you guys amaze me!=] Oh and sorry my paragraphs are a killer to the eyes! I type this on word so it's a little different on here! Again my Apologies!

_Where are the people that accuse me?_

_The ones who beat me down and bruise me_

_They hide, just out of sight_

_Can't face me in the light_

_They'll return, but I'll be stronger_

_God I want to dream again_

_Take me where I've never been_

_I want to go there_

_This time I'm not scared_

_Now I am unbreakable_

_It's unmistakable_

_No one can touch me_

_Nothing can stop _

_me_

_Sometimes it's hard to just keep going_

_But faith is moving without knowing_

_Can I trust what I can't see_

_to reach my destiny?_

_I want to take control, but I know better_

_**-Fireflight: Unbreakable**_

"Here it goes," Noodle thought, "The first day of my life." She raised a delicate hand and knocked on the cool, wooden door. Noodle heard the clicking sound of heels and wood floor, and then the door opened. There stood a beautiful red-headed woman with a blonde-haired three year old strapped to her left leg. The woman had both of her blue eyes focused on Noodle. She felt like a real mother. "Oh hunny!" Diana gushed, "What has happened to you? Come in and talk!" Noodle received the hug, and walked into Diana's home. It was so comforting. Diana's house looked like it should have belonged in a magazine! All the colors went together, and the scent of the candles burning tied all the loose ends together. Diana playfully shoved Berlin off her leg and told her, "Linny, go get into bed! It is so late and is past your bedtime! I will be up in a few minutes to tuck you in." The hesitant three year old let go of her mothers leg and ran up the large staircase. Diana rolled her eyes, "Gosh I swear that girl it stuck to me like super glue! Now Noodle sit down and let's talk!" Noodle sat in the chair across from Diana, "Well I just can't take it there anymore. It's like I didn't even have my own life anymore. Oh Diana, I got so stressed and," Noodle rolled up her sleeve to let Diana see what had came over her, "I did this. At first I didn't want to, and it hurt badly! But after I did it a few times I got so used to it and I couldn't stop!"

Noodle started to cry harder, so Diana moved over to her and hugged Noodle's tiny frame, "Noodle. That doesn't seem like you at all! Hush, hush you can stay with me as long as you need to! I will help you, Noodle I really care about you!" Diana looked at the depressed girl, "When are you due?" Noodle glanced eye to eye with Diana, "Due?" Noodle questioned. Diana rolled her eyes and laughed, "I mean when are you going to have your baby; how many more months?" Noodle laughed she had forgotten about her baby for a second, "Oh duh! I am due in three months!" Noodle shrugged her shoulders and thought, "Oh man she probably thinks I'm crazy now!" Diana smiled, "Sweetie, does any of your family know you are here, or you left?" Noodle shook her head, "No, no one does and I would like to keep it that way. I don't think I am ever going to go back there; it wasn't a very good situation." Diana nodded and helped Noodle off the chair, "Okay well I will show you to your room, and then I will see you in the morning because it is late!" Noodle laughed and followed Diana down the hall to the room that she would be staying in for awhile. Noodle's room had a huge bay window, and a soft queen sized bed. She walked over to the wooden vanity, and dumped all the contents out of her bag. Since she didn't have a lot to unpack it only took her a few minutes to place everything in its rightful spot. Noodle looked out her window into the night and thought, "Much better than Kong." Then leaped onto her bed to write in her diary.

Dear Diary,

There is not much to say today. Well I guess so. Tonight I ran away from Kong, and from all the problems. I am so glad to be out of there; of course I will miss 2D terribly, but it is a risk I have to take. Right now I am staying at Diana's house until I can find a small house or apartment of my own. I don't know where yet, but maybe not to far from here. I want to be able to stay close to Diana, because she is the best thing that I have right now! There is only one problem. If I stay in Essex then I risk myself being seen by 2D, Russel, or Murdoc. Even though they don't go out of the house much; they will still be looking around for me. Especially Russel. Oh diary, I hope me being away from Kong will help ease my wrists. I brought my knife with me and now it is drawing me near it like a magnetic force! I have to do it! You don't understand, I have to! Now, it is something that I can't live without. You have to breathe don't you?

XOXO Noodle.

Noodle put down her diary on the nightstand and fell into a deep sleep that she hadn't been able to have in awhile. A sweet dreamless sleep was exactly what she needed after so many sleepless nights. No tossing, or no turning was in the stars for Noodle that night. She could finally just relax like a rubber band that was stretched to its limits just being released. 'Thump, thump, thump'. Noodle heard on her door at nine a.m. "Noodle baby, wake up I am making pancakes!" Diana's voice piped through the walls. Noodle rolled over, "Mmm just a few minutes." She fell back into her sleep with ease until the second blow woke her up for good, "Noodle! Noodle! Noodle! Wake up! Wake up! Now, now, now, now! Berlin, and Kinsey ran into Noodle's room and started bouncing up and down on Noodle's bed with excitement, "Noodle. Noodle. Come eat and play. Noodle!" Noodle fluttered her eyes open and smiled, "What is that you say?" And grabbed Berlin down onto the bed locking her in Noodle's arms. "Now you can't escape, Berlin." Berlin giggled and squirmed around until Noodle finally let her go and they all walked down to the kitchen to eat the breakfast that waited for them. "Its about time you woke up, darling." Diana smiled and hugged Noodle with one arm while the other was occupied with flipping pancakes.

"Well I had a little help." Noodle replied and playfully glared at Berlin and Kinsey. The two little girls laughed at Noodle then ran over to their spot to receive their meal. Noodle and Diana followed them to serve up hot, fluffy pancakes. These were the best pancakes Noodle had ever tasted; even better than Russel's. The taste rolled off her tongue and down her throat with every delicious bite. Within five minutes Berlin, and Kinsey had finished and ran off to their playroom screaming something about a doll. "Do you like the pancakes, Noodle?" Asked Diana. Noodle cleared her throat and smiled, "Yes! They are the best." Then changed her face into a more serous one, "Diana. What am I going to do after the baby is born? I have no one to help support me?" Diana looked at Noodle with a concerned face, "Hunny, the baby doesn't even come for another three months. You have plenty of time to figure this out. Maybe you will go back to your family after all." Noodle shook her head, "No, I am never going back to them. And I can't now; there is no way that they would take me back." Noodles phone rang, "I wonder who it is." Noodle looked at the caller ID and to see it was from 2D's number, "Ugh, it is 2D again for like the fifth time this morning!" Diana focused her eyes on the phone, "Noodle maybe you should talk to him."

Noodle's cell phone finally stopped ringing and she waited to see if he would leave a voice mail, "Diana, I can't talk to him. I mean well he has tried to be supportive, but I can't handle it! Knowing that 2D wants to take care of my baby when it isn't even his!" Diana nodded, "Whatever you think is right." And then went back to picking at her pancakes. Noodle glanced back down at her phone and noticed that she did have one new voicemail. She pushed the button to make it play and put it on speakerphone so Diana could hear. A shaky, sad voice mumbled on the message, "Noodle? This is 2D, where are you? Noodle I love you so much, pick up please! We are all so worried about you and want you home. It doesn't even seem like home when you are gone. Why did you leave us? Are you okay? Noodle!" The message stopped. Noodle deleted the message and closed her phone, "Another lie." She mumbled between tears then got up and walked away. Diana saw that she was hurt, "Honey, where are you going?" Noodle turned back around to face Diana, "Oh I am going to go get in the bath. Is that okay?" Diana nodded, "Sure, Noodle." Noodle smiled and walked to her room where she grabbed her trusty knife and headed to the bathroom.

Noodle made sure to lock the door behind her, "Nobody has to know about this." She whispered to her knife like it had ears. She set her knife down on the marble counter and walked over to the bathtub to fill it up with warm water. When it was half full she climbed in with her knife. "Maybe I shouldn't do this." Noodle's thoughts ran through her mind, "No, I need it. I can do it only once." She took a deep breath in and dug the knife into her arm deeper and deeper. "One more can't hurt." She told herself. This time she took the knife to her thigh letting its jagged edges engrave into her skin. Her bath water was turning a shade of red telling her to stop, but she couldn't. She couldn't bring herself to let the knife drop from her hazardous hand. Finally after a cut that went to deep she let out a small yelp, and reached for her phone. She dialed the first number that came to mind. The other end picked up after two rings, "Noodle!" 2D shouted on the other line but was interrupted by Noodle's yelps, "Ouch 2D it hurts. Help! Please I am going to die! 2D!" Noodle hung up the phone and dropped it on the floor outside of the bathtub. "Why did I call him?" She questioned herself, "Great. This is just going to make everything worse!" Noodle made sure she washed off her cuts really well then climbed out of the bathtub to get dressed.

Noodle made sure she put on a long sleeve shirt to cover her wrong doings and walked out of the bathroom. She knew that they were going to find her some way or another soon. "Hey Diana, can I use your computer?" Noodle called down the hall. "Yea go ahead!" Diana called back from the living room. Noodle walked down to the office and got on Diana's laptop. "I have to find a home, apartment, or something." Noodle thought to her self, "I can't stay here for more than a few more days." Noodle's phone rang from a blocked number. This time she answered, "Stop calling I know who this is, and just because you block the number doesn't mean that I don't have common sense. And did you ever think about that maybe I don't want anyone to find me?" Noodle ranted and hung up the phone. "I can't believe them!" She yelled and clicked onto a real estate website. She looked through pages and pages of houses, and apartments, but everything was either too big, or too close to Kong. But on the last page she found what she was looking for. It was a three bedroom two bathroom apartment that had furniture inside already. It was pretty expensive for an apartment, but it was all Noodle could find. And it was four hours away from Kong. It was perfect for Noodle.

She got on her cell phone and called the agent. "Hello, yes I would like apartment seven at London towers. Yes, I will be moving in within the next 48 hours. Ok bye." Noodle squealed, "Yes! I finally have a home!" Then ran into the living room to tell Diana. "Diana guess what! I just found a three bedroom apartment. I will be moving in there tomorrow." Diana got up from the couch and ran over to hug Noodle, "Sweetie that is great! Where is it?" Noodle frowned, "It is about four hours away from here, but I needed it to be far away so I can get away from Kong." Diana nodded, "I know what you mean. Well just let me know the exact day that you are going to have your baby, and I will be right there. I don't want you to have to do this all on your own! So you are leaving tomorrow, huh?" Noodle nodded, "Yes, I am. I have to get out of here and the sooner the better! And Diana I would love it if you helped me have this baby." Noodle giggled, "I mean be there when I have the baby." Tears welled up in Noodle's eyes, "Diana, thank you for being so kind to me when I thought I was all alone! I could have never done anything without you!" Diana sighed, "Noodle, don't worry it was the least that I could do!"

Again Noodle slept peacefully that night. Aware of what the day ahead would bring. It was like it was the start of a new beginning for her. It also felt like it was going to be all a bad dream. Like she was going to wake up and find herself on Kong's bathroom floor all over again. Remembering all of that pain made her stomach churn, as she tried to erase all those memories from her head. But they just kept coming back. Soon her peaceful night turned out not so peaceful. For starters her cell phone kept ringing. It was 2D again trying to call her just so he could say I love you to her one last time. Another was that she could not stop imagining herself on the bathroom floor. It seemed like it was happening over and over again. And no matter how many times she tried she couldn't make it stop. She kept seeing herself in pain, and crying but no one would come and help her. They just all laughed at her outside the door. Of course that isn't what really happened, but it seemed as bad as that. But surprisingly she was helplessly unbreakable.

The daylight broke through the windows like the waves broke through the sand on the beach. The first thing Noodle did was look at her phone; 13 missed calls. And all of them were either from 2D, or Murdoc's phone. How many times did he have to call her? Didn't he get that she was never coming back? To him, or Kong; she was done with it all. Noodle rolled her eyes, and deleted all the messages, "I really need to change my number." She said, and started gathering up all of her things so she could move into her new house as soon as possible. She was ready to get a hold of her life. She grabbed her little bag of items she brought from Kong and walked out into the living room to meet Diana. Soon they were on their way to Noodle's new apartment! Noodle was so excited that she couldn't contain it and let out a little scream. Diana looked over at Noodle and laughed, "Hunny, either you are in labor, or someone is excited about their new house." Noodle smiled at Diana, "No, I am not in labor. I am excited to get into my new house." Noodle glanced out the window and took in the buzzing freeway that surrounded them. It was beautiful to her. Not many people would consider a freeway beautiful, but to Noodle it was a sign of life. It showed her that there was other people really out there besides her, Murdoc, 2D, and Russel. A life outside of home.

"Diana it is so beautiful." Noodle sputtered out while looking at all the monotone of colors flashing by. Diana looked out Noodle's side of the window to see what she was looking at, "Noodle it is just a freeway. Are you okay, Hun?" Noodle looked back at Diana and rolled her eyes, "Yes I am fine Diana. It just seems so alive. It is like I have been kept in a tiny fish bowl my whole life. Then all of a sudden I got flushed down the toilet, and now I am in the Ocean. The ocean that is so big and beautiful." Diana looked at Noodle as if she was crazy and went back to driving. Noodle let out a little sigh. She was going to miss not being to see her ocean, but the apartments that she was moving in was on the ocean side. But it still wasn't her ocean with her rock. This was truly going to be a big adventure for her. She watched the cars fly by one by one for about another tiring hour then let her heavy eyes fall to sleep.

"Noodle, Hunny wake up we are here!" Noodle awoke to the smell of sweet ocean air and Diana standing over her outside of the car. "We are where?" Noodle asked. Diana looked at her with wide eyes, "Noodle! We are at your new house!" Noodle blinked a few times unaware of what Diana was saying, but she finally snapped back to reality, "We are here?" Noodle asked in a half yell. Diana nodded again, "Yes! Come on lets go!" Noodle got up out of that car so fast that you would have thought that it was on fire. The duo ran past crowds of people, and tourists to get to Noodles apartment. They spent two minutes counting apartments. "One, four, eight, seven!" Noodle shouted and ran to the front of the building. It was perfect. Noodle's apartment was right on the beach. All she had to do was open her front door, and the beach was right there calling her name. "Diana." She whispered, "It is so perfect!" Noodle jumped into Diana's arms and gave her a worthwhile hug. She never had a mom before, but is this what it feels like? Noodle broke free of the hug held up her key, "This is the first time I am ever opening my door!" She shrieked and shoved the key in the lock and turned the knob. The door opened perfectly and they entered the apartment. As the ad promised the apartment had three bedrooms, and two bathrooms. It also had all the furniture inside witch wasn't bad looking at all.

Diana covered Noodle's eyes, "I have two final surprises for you!" Noodle uncovered her eyes, "Diana!" She protested, but Diana led her out to the huge parking lot anyway. In Noodle's parking spot was a brand new black car. "Diana!" Noodle screamed and hugged her, "I needed a car, but you didn't have to do this!" Diana laughed, "I know Noodle, but I wanted to. That is not all, but I also got your cell phone number changed for you. I hope you don't mind." Noodle gave Diana another hug, "Diana thank you so much that is exactly what I needed. If I am going to start a new life then I shouldn't let the past in right?"

Noodle's days soon grew darker. Diana left that night and Noodle had great first days, but after that she began to question herself once more. She started cutting again, and not eating. Eating only so her baby wouldn't die. She missed 2D, but she hated him all at the same time. She began to think that she saw clearly why she left Kong, but she was thinking of all the wrong reasons. She decided she needed to die. Someway or another, but the sooner the better. Could she let her body go to the Ocean as well? It was her only comfort. Unbreakable, that's what she had thought.

_Forget the fear, it's just a crutch_

_That tries to hold you back until your dreams are dust_

_All you need to do is just trust_

_(Trust, trust, trust)_

_God I want to dream again_

_Take me where I've never been_

_I want to go there_

_This time I'm not scared_

_Now I am unbreakable_

_It's unmistakable_

_No one can touch me_

_Nothing can stop me_

_**-Fireflight: Unbreakable**_

Erika Note: Yay you have no idea how awesome you guys are! Thank you so much for reviewing, but this story is not over yet. And no Noodle didn't just kill herself. Well sorry this took so long! I have been having some knee issues that have pretty much taking over my teenage life. Well I took some advice and tried to make my paragraphs smaller, so I will see how this works! THANK YOU! You guys are amazing please continue to review! It makes me want to continue writing this story! Lets see how many reviews I can get in 12 hours… Ready? GO!

Wait wait wait!!! Read about my amazing reviewers!

THANK YOU: Swizzers, Jessi, Grim- The Reaper Of Death, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!!!

Woo PLEASE REVIEW ^_^. They did, so it can't be too hard!


	10. Waltz Moore

_I can't eat anything_

_Without shoving my hands down my throat_

_And I refuse to meet the world without smearing on makeup_

_With my hair blinding my eyes_

_Oh, blinding my eyes_

_I can't remember the last time I've seen my own eyes_

_Or the color of my skin_

_Do you know what it's like to feel ugly all the time?_

_I stretch myself across the world_

_Pushing my limits_

_For your entertainment and_

_You had the nerve_

_To call out my weaknesses and_

_drag me through the dirt_

_**-From First To Last: Waltz Moore**_

"Another day without Noodle?" Murdoc asked 2D as he was walking swiftly into the kitchen, "She doesn't want you anyway dullard." 2D got up to his feet, "That is not true Murdoc! She will realize that she does need me!" Murdoc glanced at 2D and rolled his eyes, "Whatever helps you sleep at night, mate." 2D sat back down at the table. Was this all really happening? Or was it a dream that he hadn't woken up from yet? Whatever the issue was he just wanted it all to stop. Ever since Noodle left everything was much darker around Kong. It seemed like everyone was always sulking around. Everyone was affected except Murdoc. He didn't seem to be affected at all, and he always went about his business everyday like nothing ever happened. 2D remembered that morning like it was a few hours ago. He had just woken up, and he was so glad that Noodle was going to be asleep next to him, but when she turned around she was gone. The covers were torn of that side of the bed and the pillow was on the floor.

So he got up and searched for that bag that she brought with her last night. The bag was also gone, and there was a hanger in the door. 2D had no idea of where she went to, so of course he went upstairs to check her room and all of Kong. He looked and looked, but Noodle was nowhere to be found. 2D even checked in the same places twice maybe three times. There was still no sign of Noodle. He ran out to tell Russel who was so upset that he could hardly talk, and Murdoc was almost happy that she was gone responding with, "Well now we don't have to worry about the baby." How could he be so happy? That question was running through 2D's mind that whole morning. Finally after three hours of making sure that Noodle was nowhere on the Kong property 2D called her. With no answer several times. Russel and 2D both were worried sick about Noodle. What if something happened to her? And why did she run off? There was the possibility that someone took her, but no one but Noodle would think to put the hanger in the door. So that idea was overruled. She left them; for good.

Remembering that made 2D's eyes wet with sadness. "Oh Noodle where are you?" He yelled out loud expecting her to answer him with her sweet voice. No sound but the slamming of a random door was heard and 2D buried his head in his hands once more. "Noodle's baby is going to be born in a few days, and I am not even going to be there." He sobbed, "I love and care for her so much. No one understands how painful this is to me! All I wanted is for Noodle and Me to be together and to be happy. Well, how can we do this now?" 2D carried on, "How can we do this now?" He repeated letting his voice echo off of Kong's hard walls. "This shouldn't be so hard." He told himself and quieted down while Murdoc stalked into the kitchen yet again for another beer. Trying to hold all of his anger inside of him didn't really work and he spat out at Murdoc, "What do you think we are going to do about our band, huh? I know you don't care enough about Noodle to find out where she is for her, but what about for the band?" Did you ever think about that, Murdoc?" 2D ranted at him with his nostrils flaring. Murdoc slammed the refrigerator, ran over to the table, and slammed his beer bottle down hard onto the table making it split into tiny pieces.

"Our band, huh 2D? I think it is more of my band. So don't be calling it our band when it is really my band." Murdoc spat back at 2D, "And since it is my band I make the dissensions. One of them being that we don't need Noodle if she doesn't need us. We are Gorillaz; we can find any bum on the street that would kill to play in my band with us." Murdoc glared at 2D with so much intensity. 2D sniffed, "But," Murdoc interrupted still not taking his mismatched eyes off 2D, "But nothing, 2D. Noodle left us. She left you! She obviously doesn't want to be with you, got it? Now shut up I can't even think over those girlish sops." Murdoc turned on his heel not caring about the broken bottle and went down to the car park. "That's not true." 2D thought to himself. He just couldn't believe that Noodle didn't want to be with him. Noodle was actually the one that started the relationship. How could she go from being deeply in love with him to wanting to leave him? And what if she is truly hurt? Who would help her, and whom would she let help her?

"Dammit Murdoc!" Russel growled as he walked into the kitchen and saw the mess of broken glass, and beer all over the wood table and the floor. "Gosh 2D you get him all worked up then who has to clean it up? Me, I do every time." 2D looked up at the face of Russel, "Yeah sorry Russ. It just bothers me how Murdoc doesn't even give a shit about Noodle. He has a 'If she left us then we don't need her' attitude. Which is wrong because we do need her; well I do." 2D turned his gaze away from Russel and to a wall; the only thing pleasant to look at anymore. Russel grabbed a blue washcloth from a drawer and started cleaning up Murdoc's mess, "I know 2D. It is going to be really hard around here for a while but who knows maybe she will turn up here someday. I mean she can't be in that bad of a situation right now. By the way," Russel added, "Do you know she is going to have her baby in a couple of months?" 2D was still interested in the white wall, "Yes, I do know that, but that doesn't make things any better." 2D took a deep breath in just trying to get the words out, "Russ, what if she is cutting herself again. I did notice that she took that knife with her." Russel pretended like he didn't hear what 2D was saying, but responded, "Well she is a smart girl. She wont do it to much." 2D was amazed that Russel would even think that. If 2D had ever said that before Russel would have a panic attack and would go get Noodle no matter where she was.

"Russel she is doing it, and she wont just do it 'a little'. You saw how she was." Russel finished wiping up the last of the visible beer, and turned to face 2D, "Yes, 2D I think that you are right, but what are we supposed to do? Noodle just got up and left like that I really have no idea about what to think right now except I really want her home. And the idea of her having a baby, and having to go through that all alone makes me sick to my stomach. It feels like I should have listened to her more, but she never came to me in the first place." Russel sighed and walked off to go get a dustpan and broom to clean up the sharp glass. 2D eyed the glass. "Is it really that sharp?" He thought as he picked up a piece and twirled it around in his fingers. "Doesn't seem that sharp." He concluded and decided that he would experiment. This is what Noodle felt he thought as he dragged the glass across his wrist in a diagonal motion. "Shit." He thought as he saw the stream of blood coming out of the cut, and ran off to the nearest bathroom with the piece of glass still in his hot little hand. "Shit, shit, shit." He whispered all the way to the nearest bathroom at Kong.

2D ran down the last meters to the bathroom, slammed the door then ran his wrist under water. The water washed away most of the blood, but some was still coming out, "Go away!" 2D shrieked, and didn't really understand why he did it in the first place. "Was it because Noodle did it?" 2D asked himself, "Or did I want to feel her pain?" 2D grabbed for the soap wincing when it climbed deep down into his cuts. "Aw Noodle please come home!" 2D whispered as another shot of pain shimmied up his arm. "Please, please come home!" 2D could see that his method of just wishing Noodle was home wasn't working very well so he tried plan two. "God, if you are really out there can you please bring Noodle back home? I know I have done some things in the past, but please she could be dying out there, and she is having her baby in a few days. I don't want her to be alone, or scared! God, please help, please!" 2D begged squeezing his hands together so hard that once again warm, red blood started to trickle down them. "Ugh." 2D grunted and turned back to the soap letting it bite him all it wanted.

Murdoc heard all the water running and decided that he would investigate, "Hey dullard! Are you in there?" 2D rolled his eyes, and shut off the water, "Yeah Muds I am." Murdoc tried to open the door, "Unlock the door now." 2D responded with a one syllable word, "No.". That was enough for Murdoc to start loosing his temper, "2D open the damn door now!" 2D reached over for a towel and dried his arm; not even caring to answer Murdoc. "2D, didn't you hear me? NOW!" Murdoc's veins were popping out of his head with every strained word. But before Murdoc was totally done saying his last word 2D busted out of the bathroom, and headed to the car park. He just had enough of Murdoc for that day. He used the stairs remembering Noodle's rant about the elevator, "Gosh I miss her." He thought to himself although people could see that on the outside as well. Getting into his room he slammed the door like some upset teenage girl, and flopped down onto his bed. "I remember how I always sang her to sleep." He thought still thinking about Noodle. "Her favorite song was El manana; I used to sing it to her every night." 2D laid belly up on his bed counting the cracks in the ceiling. Nothing felt right to him anymore. He felt like he had completely lost everything; even though in reality he really hadn't. He never wished for this to ever happen. Why was it him? Why not Murdoc, or Russel? "Of course it wouldn't be them," he thought, "Because they are not screw ups. They are not me; I'm worthless." With that note 2D grabbed a beer and drank himself to sleep.

Noodle sat on the couch of her new apartment watching TV. An ad came on for some baby food, "Give your baby the best you can give it," the commercial proclaimed, "Give it Wallace." Noodle rolled her eyes and switched the channel. She did not want to see anymore baby product commercials. Not food, clothes, toys, or diapers. Her baby was coming in a few days, but she still wasn't ready. Of course she went out to the store and bought a crib, changing table, clothes, formula, and a stuffed bear, but still none of it seemed real. She could still remember when she was a kid and Russel would pick her up swing her around, and also when he used to play dolls with her. Now, it seemed like she could be that old, non-pregnant Noodle. But she couldn't. There was no way for Noodle to change the past now that it had already taken its course. Noodle glanced down at her bandaged arms. She hadn't cut herself for days because she knew that she would be going to the hospital soon, and god know what they will say about it. Also because Diana was coming over tomorrow to stay with Noodle for a few days, and when the baby was born.

And who was she kidding she had no time for re-bandaging her arms. Every time she was always to careless to wash out her cuts so usually she would just attempt to put multiple bandages on her arms until she got so frustrated she could hardly see. Most the time she didn't even want to bandage her arms. Everybody in the world already knew anyway. "Hmm." Noodle sighed and peeled back one of her many bandages on her arm. "Good no more bleeding!" Noodle exclaimed and peeled back all the rest, and waited. Surely enough only about 30 seconds after she took the bandages off thin layers of blood turned into thicker layers and she would have to re-bandage her arms again. But she didn't. Instead she just sat there and the couch letting her shirt soak up all the rusty blood; making her appearance look like she had just killed someone. Which Noodle would never want to kill someone, but then why did she want to kill herself? Noodle knew she couldn't do it even if she really tried, but everyday she thought about it either once or more. Maybe it was just baby hormones, but again maybe not.

'Ring, Ring, Ring.' Noodle answered her phone, "Hey Diana!" Diana answered back to Noodle on the other line, "Hey honey. I think I will actually come up tonight so I can just get up there. Is that okay?" Noodle glanced around her apartment; it was awfully messy, "Sure Diana that's fine! I heard that I could go into labor anytime anyway. I guess I will see you in a little while." Noodle hung up her cell phone and put it in her pocket, "Crap, now I have to go clean up." She got up and went to change her clothes from the stained, bloody ones to clean acceptable clothes. Then she made a mad dash around her apartment to clean every visible surface. Cleaning was something that she never really did. When she was living in Kong she never had to clean. Russel always cleaned, and did it very well. The only thing she had ever had to clean was her room; which usually wasn't so bad. So, Noodle was not used to cleaning when she moved into her apartment, but she soon adapted, and was able to perform the task excellent. Noodle made sure to clean the three rooms and the entire bathrooms well. Her kitchen was already clean because she can't stand a dirty kitchen it was one of her pet peeves. Her living room was another story. It was so dirty because her living room is where she mostly had been for the many months. She couldn't really go out and do anything because of the chance being seen by the boys. So, she sat home and did completely nothing for months.

Soon Diana arrived and the two girls sat down to eat a dinner that Noodle prepared all by herself. She didn't mind at all to cook. It was one of her favorite things that she used to do. Whenever Russel was cooking she would always stand over his shoulder watching his every move, so maybe someday she would be able to cook like that. So that night Noodle made spaghetti with garlic bread and salad. Spaghetti was one of her all time favorite dishes. "So are you excited?" Diana asked over dinner. Noodle finished her bite of tasteful spaghetti and replied, "About having a baby? I am more scared! Does it hurt?" Diana laughed, "Yes, it does hurt, but it is so worth it in the end trust me!" Noodle rolled her eyes, "I am still scared! What if they mess up on the epidural and I get paralyzed!" Diana downed her third glass of water and shook her head, "Don't worry about that. They won't mess up I promise! Just don't move while they are putting it in." Noodle's eyes grew big, "Does that hurt?" Diana laughed even harder, "The epidural? Yes, it hurts, but I can't imagine having a baby without it!" Noodle nodded and went back to eating her dinner. That dinner was probably the most nutritionist meal she had eaten in a while.

Soon after three movies, and hours of talking the girls were ready to go to bed and get some good sleep so they could brace for the days ahead. But nobody knew Noodle was due a few days before everyone was expecting. "Owww, oh god, owww." Noodle heaved the morning after Diana had arrived. "Diana!" Noodle yelled trying to wake her up, "Diana!" There was still no answer. Noodle got off her bed and walked out into the living room where Diana was still sleeping, "Diana!" Noodle yelled once more this time successfully waking her up. "What is it Noodle?" Diana yawned and opened her eyes to see Noodle clutching her round stomach, "Did you pee yourself?" Diana asked then realized, "Oh gosh Noodle! Your water broke we have to get you to the hospital!" Noodle nodded, "Okay, oww, this really hurts!" Tightening her hand around Diana's arm they walked to Diana's car, and sped off to the nearest hospital. "Um, just take really deep breaths in." Diana suggested while Noodle was wincing in pain from a contraction. "I'm trying!" Noodle yelled, and started to breathe in deeper each time. Diana sped down the streets, and school zones passing every car that she could all the way to the hospital. When they got there Diana didn't even mind to park the car in a parking space. She just pulled over, and got Noodle out of the car and rushed her into the hospital.

"She's in la.." Was all Diana had to say then they rushed Noodle to a delivery room, and put in her epidural. "Noodle your baby is coming really fast!" Diana announced. Noodle looked worried, "Is that okay?" Diana nodded, "Yes that is how Berlin was too when I had her." Noodle nodded and tried to focus on something that wasn't moving, "Diana, I can't do this. I can't have this baby, oww." Noodle stressed out her words, "I don't know what I am going to do!" She cried. Moments later Dr. Tsuchida walked in and told Noodle it was about time to have her baby. And surely enough moments later after sweating, and pushing Noodle was holding her baby girl in her arms. She had Noodle's hair, and her eyes. Her baby hardly looked a thing like Murdoc. Which in this case was very good! "Hi Ayumi." Noodle whispered to the small infant kissing her head, "I'm mommy."

_Ooh_

_I'm staring in the mirror_

_Looking back at the person I hate_

_Ooh_

_I'm staring in the mirror_

_Looking back at the person I hate_

_Ooh_

_I'm staring in the mirror_

_Looking back at the person I hate_

_Ooh_

_I'm staring in the mirror_

_Looking back at the person I hate_

_I cant remember the last time ive seen my own eyes(eyes)_

_Or the color of my skin_

_Do you know what its like_

_I cant remember the last time_

_I've seen my own eyes_

_Or the color of my skin do you know_

_what its like too feel ugly all the time!_

_Ooh_

_Ooh_

_The color of my skin_

_Do you know what its like to feel ugly all the......_

_**-From First To Last: Waltz Moore**_

Erika Note: Hey Guys! I hope you liked the chapter. Sorry if it was a little too fast paced in parts! There are probably 1-2max chapters left. But the good thing is I will be starting another story soon! It will be a Gorillaz story so keep watch! I will probably start it right after this one is finished! Ok I will clear this up a little yes I am a dancer, but at the moment I am not because of my knee. That (by the way) I have to have surgery on May 15. They are cutting out my right ligament completely, and taking a piece of bone out of my joint, smoothing the damaged cartledge, and taking out tissue from my hamstring to use that as a ligament. Oh sorry if you didn't need to know that I'm just clearing things up! PLEASE REVIEW! It only takes about 3 seconds!

THANK YOU: Swizzers (duh), Jessi, and Name2830. Thank you guys so much! You have supported me the whole way and hopefully through these last chapters! I love hearing from you, honestly!

Erika


	11. Broken Wings

_Thank you for being_

_such a friend to me_

_Oh I pray a friend for life_

_And have I ever told you_

_how much you mean to me_

_Oh you mean so much to me_

_I'm thinking all the time_

_how to tell you what I feel_

_I'm contemplating phrases_

_I'm gazing on eternity_

_I am floating in serenity_

_And I am so lost for words_

_And I am so overwhelmed_

_**-Flyleaf: Broken Wings**_

Dear Diary,

It has been three months. Three months since I have seen Diana. Three months since I have had Ayumi. Three months still without 2D. Of course I have talked to Diana, but it seems like both of us are too busy to make time for each other. I miss her very badly she seemed like family to my and I'm sure Ayumi thinks she is too. Ayumi is doing really well. Actually I think I take better care of her than I take care of myself. Yes, diary I still cut myself, but I am getting better I promise. Right now Ayumi is too little to understand what I am doing, but I will have to stop before she can understand. 2D has tried to call me many times, but I have never answered. So he just leaves me messages saying how much he misses me, and hopes that I am okay. Sometime I hope that I can get over all of this and finally answer the phone. I really need him more than I ever thought that I would.

I miss his laugh, and his smile. I didn't realize this, but when I was living at Kong I was so used to it that I didn't notice what an amazing smile he had, but now that I am gone I would give almost anything just to see his smiling face again. Same with Russel I really miss him. He was like my daddy, and I only wish that he could be in Ayumi's life because she really has no other family besides me. I know that Russel would want to see his granddaughter anyways. But again he will never get to because I can never go back to Kong again and I know that. It would seem like a new strange building to me again just like how it felt when I first arrived at Kong. At first I didn't even know that I was going to be living there. I thought that I would have to go out and try to find my own place to live. But that plan fell through when Murdoc first led me to my room. I remember thinking that it was a tad bit small, but I never said anything because I didn't know English at that time.

Which reminds me of another story when Russel was trying to teach me English. Yes that was quite an experience! Since I didn't know how to form English words they would always come out wrong and I know that Russel got really frustrated, but he never tired to show that he was. Murdoc on the other hand would full out yell at me when I got something wrong, but it's okay because I couldn't understand him at the time. 2D helped a little and he was also very patient with me; well most of the time. I can truly say that after a year I fully understood English. Today there is a few words that I have to ask someone what they mean, but that's because the boys only taught me what they were capable of.

I was only about ten when I first arrived at Kong. And it was frightening and beautiful all at the same time! It was definitely a new chapter in my life, and I have had many more since then. Way too many to count! I remember for my 13th birthday the boys (tried) to throw a huge party for me. Yeah, my 'party' had alcohol, a stripper or two, and drinking games. That wasn't the best party I have ever had, but it meant so much to me that they actually tried. And of course I didn't drink. Okay, well never mind I did a little, but 'not enough to count'. The boys on the other hand were done. They probably downed more than a liquor store owned between the three of them. Let's just say the next morning was dubbed 'the hangover from hell day'. So every year on that date they get dunk again, and now it is kind of our own little holiday.

You know what Diary? All my life I don't think that I have ever had a really good girl friend. All my 'friends' have been 2D, Murdoc, or Russel. I am not including Diana in this one because she is more like a mother. I guess I never really had time to make any friends between touring, practicing, and sleeping. Sometimes I thought that was okay, but now that I am living on my own I really wish that I had made more girl friends. Sometimes I just need someone my own ago to talk to, and well I never do. Nobody really knows how that feels except me. Mostly every girl I have seen is hanging out with a group of girls, or one best friend. No, no not Noodle. She only hangs out with those three guys. I always think about that whenever I see girls staring at me. But then again maybe they are thinking well about me than I think because I always assume the worst. Believe me it's a habit. Russel noticed that when I was very young, and since he told me I recognize that every time I speak. Seriously you should hear me when I talk Diary. I only wish that you could talk back to me. Maybe you would be my girl friend.

And the first time that I noticed 2D as something other than just a friend. I'm pretty sure I was about 15 then. I remember we just got done playing a show and he already had a line of groupies standing outside the bus. Well that night I told him that I didn't want him to bring any girl on the bus, and well he didn't! Murdoc still did, but 2D didn't for me. That night as I was lying in my top bunk above 2D's in the bus I noticed how much I cared for him. And not just only as a friend, but more than that. Of course I never said anything to him about it not when he had another girl in his room, not when he had two girls in his room, or not when he almost got engaged. But that is another story. So I kept quite for about a year and a half until we started dating, and I believe you already know that story. He was and is the love of my life. And it is hurting myself that I have to stay away from him, but I couldn't imagine going back now.

Then my life seemed to go down the drain. I have no idea of which it was that got into me weather it was I being pregnant or Murdoc raping me. Maybe it was both, but I know when I fell I fell pretty hard. I started cutting myself only the slightest bit just so I felt some relief, but soon as you know the need to overcame me and I started doing it worse and worse each time. Up to the point that now I have to be in the bathtub because if I am not it would look like a murder took place in my apartment. Even with Ayumi around it doesn't necessarily stop me. Sometimes it seems like the need to cut myself is stronger than my love for Ayumi. I know that is just wrong, but you have to understand my point of view. I can't stop and now it is ruining my life! I wonder because Russel never once has called me and I think it is because of my cuttings. I could be wrong, but I am pretty sure it is because when I first saw his face when he saw my cuts was outstanding. I have never seen that face before and I am sure that I never want to see it again.

I have tried to ask god for forgiveness, and to help me not to cut again, but either he didn't hear me or I'm not praying the right way. I think he knows that I will just end up cutting again. Even I know that. I think by now everyone knows that. I wish they didn't but being in the public eye you never have anything to hide. Everybody sees everything you do and that's all there is to it. If you don't want anyone to know then don't do it. The rules are plain and simple, but I still seem to break them. I try and try to cover up the cuts, but do you know how hard it is to make sure your sweatshirt doesn't slip up even the slightest bit? Let me answer that for you; it is really hard. Unless you are a mannequin that stands still and doesn't breathe all day long, but we all know that I am no mannequin. And no thank you I rather not be a mannequin. I am happy being Noodle and just Noodle. If this is truly my life now I will just have to put a fake smile on my face and deal with it. Not the best that I can, but deal with it perfectly.

So what is my once perfect sky is now cloudy and grey? Maybe it is just going to be a new chapter for me, and right now I am open to it. I am pretty sure that I can handle it. At least I hope so because this seems like it is coming fast and I need to react. Not react as in cutting myself but react as in facing life in a new direction. Maybe I will start going to church; Haha Murdoc would hate that. Maybe I will run away to the circus. Maybe I will move back to Japan. Maybe I will sell myself out. Maybe I will find another true love. Maybe I won't. Maybe I will go back to Kong. Maybe. But for now I think I am fine just where I am until I get my life more under control, or I might have to go away just to get it under control. Who knows? Maybe someone will just come out and tell me. And whenever 2D calls again I am going to be ready and I AM going to answer the phone. Who knows he could call at anytime, or he might not call at all. Whatever happens I am finally ready for my book to be opened again and to start a new chapter of my life.

XOXO, Noodle.

Noodle closed her diary for what seemed like the last time. She felt that now she really didn't need to write every detail of her life down anymore. If this truly were a new chapter she would find some other way to get her thoughts out. She lifted up her heavy mattress with her new found strength and shoved her ex-diary underneath. Then she walked over to Ayumi's room to check on her sleeping baby. Ayumi had the cutest round face and soft hair. And was sleeping soundlessly. Noodle smiled and kissed her baby and her head and walked out of Ayumi's room into the living room. "It is a nice day." Noodle announced to herself and put on a pair of her flip-flops so she could go outside when she had the chance. She grabbed her keys and locked the door on her way out. Noodle knew exactly where she wanted to go without going to far. She wanted to go to the cliff that lingered over the roaring ocean, and watch the waves crash below her. She walked along the bank above the beach until she got to her destination. It was so beautiful almost like her rock. But this would have to be her new spot since her rock was out of the question to go to now.

Noodle climbed to the tip of the cliff and let the ocean breeze sweep away her beautiful tears, and pull her hair away from her face. She looked beyond the horizon of the ocean and the breath taking sunset, and thought that this was going to be a new beginning for her. She once again let the ocean take away all of her tears from her face. "When did it all get so messed up?" She asked herself and looked at the waves below the ocean, "If I don't jump down there I will truly know that I am strong enough not just for me, but for my daughter." Noodle cried harder when she tried to think about how perfect her life would have been if she didn't cut herself and if she had stayed with the man of her dreams. She wiped her tears away from her face, "No, I'm not jumping." She gazed out over the water clearing her mind about everything she had done. "This is a new beginning," she agreed.

Then Noodle's phone rang…..

_Please don't go just yet_

_Can you stay a moment please_

_We can dance together_

_We can dance forever_

_Under your stars tonight_

_We'll live and breathe this dream_

_Close your eyes, but don't dream too deep_

_And please pass me some memories_

_And when I fall you're underneath_

_A thousand broken hearts_

_Carried by a thousand broken wings_

_A thousand broken wings_

_**-Flyleaf: Broken Wings**_

Erika Note: THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER!!!!!! I finished this story! But there is a possibility that I WILL have a sequel. So let me know what you think about a sequel. And also it would be helpful if you tell me what you would like to see in the sequel. I will be starting a new story very soon and I am pretty sure that the title will be "Beyond My Own Dreams." It will also be with the Gorillaz characters and one of my own characters. It will also be a very dramatic/sad/comfort story! So I hope you will watch for that one coming soon. And if you want a sequel to this story that will be in the works also. I want to just say THANK YOU to all the people who have read this story and/or reviewed! You made me continue on with this story! I hope to get more reviews in the future as well.

Some quick notes:

I left the ending open to a possible sequel

I am starting a new story ("Beyond My Own Dreams") soon keep watch!

Please Review I want to know how I did!

Last but not least YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING!!!

Last chapters reviewers: Name2830, Andrea, Resurrection Jirrue, knightmare08, Jessi. THANK YOU THANK YOU

Well this is goodbye for now and I hope to see you soon!

XOXO, Erika


	12. AUTHOR NOTE

Author note: Okay so I have returned here to Fanficiton and I want to know if you guys would truly like me to continue this story! Any opinions and feedback would we awesome! It was been quite a while since I wrote this story but I have some major inspiration. So please tell me your opinion! And if you want more I will sure bring it to you! Thanks for all of you that have supported me throughout all of this! And as always you can always talk to me! About anything really. Give me a message!

Thanks- Erika


End file.
